Wednesday, March 29, 2017

DrogeMiester's Billboard Analysis - April 8, 2017

The new Billboard charts have arrived and so it's time again for me to give you my thoughts! In this weekly post, I cover three sections. First, I give my thoughts on the top 10 of the Billboard Hot 100. Second, I give my thoughts on the songs that experienced significant gains below the top 10. Third, I give my initial thoughts on our new arrivals this week. I may decide to switch things up in the future, but for now this is what I'm sticking with. I've followed the Billboard charts for a long time now and this is a great way for me to express my thoughts to the world. I hope you enjoy!

Billboard Hot 100 Top 10:

1- "Shape of You" - Ed Sheeran (=) -- Ed now has nine weeks at No. 1 and is just one week away from being yet another song that has gone 10 weeks on top. From 1958 to 1991, this only happened twice. Now it's a regular occurrence. But the big question right now is how long will "Shape of You" reign at No. 1? At this point in its run, it shows no signs of slowing down as it peaked at just the right time as it has taken advantage of the weak competition while being stronger than ever. Bruno is about take the lead in sales, but Ed's radio is closing in on record levels and streaming is still super high, so Bruno is in no position to take the title away from Ed. I think last week I said 10-12 weeks for this song. Now I'm thinking its more along the lines of 12-14.

2- "That's What I Like" - Bruno Mars (=) -- As I just stated, Bruno's sales are doing well and will probably overtake, but Bruno is nowhere near Ed in streaming and radio, so this looks like it will be camped out at No. 2 for a while longer. And I'm fine with that. Many are sick of Ed at No. 1 right now and want a new chart topper. I'd be fine with that idea, but at what cost? Out of our current songs in the top 10, "Shape of You" is still the second best song out of the bunch of them, which "Something Just Like This" being the only one ahead of it. I don't really enjoy "That's What I Like" or anything else for that matter, so let's let Ed keep his place at top until something worthy comes around to take his place.

3- "I Don't Wanna Live Forever (Fifty Shades Darker)" - Zayn & Taylor Swift (+1) -- Don't be too surprised to see Zayn and Taylor retake the top spot. It's nothing that they did. This song isn't that strong as has no chance of overtaking Ed or Bruno. It's just that "Bad and Boujee" is falling a whole heck of a lot faster, so it just naturally jumped up by default. Something has to be at three.

4- "Bad and Boujee" - Migos featuring Lil Uzi Vert (-1) -- I'm certainly glad that this fell a spot once again, but can it please fall even faster? At this point I'll even take "Tunnel Vision" or "Passionfruit" instead of "Bad and Boujee," but I hope that The Weeknd and/or The Chainsmokers can jump ahead instead.

5- "I Feel it Coming" - The Weeknd featuring Daft Punk (=) -- I'm really happy to see this stay consistent at No. 5. I feared it would take a fall after last week's iTunes discount gave it a huge boost. I guess nothing is really strong right now, so this song just stays here by default. And if "Bad and Boujee" continues to bleed, perhaps "I Feel it Coming" gets pushed up even higher. And if Taylor and Zayn start losing radio, maybe this jumps up and camps at No. 3 for a while? That would be cool.

6- "Tunnel Vision" - Kodak Black (=) -- I keep thinking "Tunnel Vision" might be another candidate to hit top 10. But it has zero momentum right now with only streaming going in its favor, so I want to say this drops here soon, but again if everything above loses steam faster, then it could still sneak into the top 5. Moral of the story is we're ready for another major shift in the top 10 right now, but nothing seems to want it. Katy Perry will be back next week as "Chained to the Rhythm" just added the iTunes discount. And I sure hope that Lorde can start gaining traction.

7- "Something Just Like This" - The Chainsmokers & Coldplay (+1) -- This I feel is a strong contender to go top five here soon. I don't know if it is going to get strong enough to jump ahead of Ed and Bruno, but everything else is just so weak right now and I feel this has enough traction right now to jump as high as No. 3. And I'm certainly happy about that. Best song in the top 10 right now!

8- "Passionfruit" - Drake (new) -- A lot more on Drake here coming soon, so I'll keep this brief. Drake's new album was released last week, which affected the charts in a major way as Drake has all of the tracks from the album on the Billboard Hot 100 this week. That's 21 new songs for Drake debuting, which is a record that was previous set by himself last year with "Views." An annoying trend to say the least. There's not much good here to talk about, but at least the best song debuted highest. Last year all the songs from "Views" were stubbornly consistent. Let's hope this year is different as I'd really like them all to go away. But that's probably not going to happen. At the very least let's hope this album doesn't give him another No. 1 hit.

9- "Portland" - Drake featuring Quavo & Travis Scott (new) -- "Passionfruit" is the only Drake song that I can really tolerate from this album, so if we had to debut a Drake song in the top 10, I'm glad that was the one. The problem, though, is that Drake becomes the second artist after Ed Sheeran a couple of months ago to debut two songs in the top 10 at the same time and "Portland" is easily the worst from the album. Let's please hope that this is a one and done in the top 10.

10- "Paris" - The Chainsmokers (-1) -- "Paris" drops to No. 10 this week. But it's not all that bad for it actually. With Drake debuting two songs in the top 10, "Paris" could've easily dropped out, but instead it was "Love on the Brain" and "iSpy" that got the boot instead of "Paris," so that shows me that it still has a bit of staying power left and could jump up a notch or two next week if our two Drake songs take a hit. With Katy surging in sales this week, at the very least I think "Paris" gets one more week at No. 10, but we'll see what happens.

Rising on the Hot 100:

15- "Fake Love" - Drake (+16) -- With Drake debuting 21 new songs this week, there weren't a lot of high risers. Most songs either got pushed down or shoved out. That should mean this section will be very crowded next week, though. Or so we all hope. The 22nd and final song on Drake's album is this one and since it has been out since December, it's here on the rising list instead of the new arrivals. Let's hope this is just a one week boost for this song because I really don't want to see it back in the top 10. Sure there's a lot worse songs from the album, but as you will quickly learn, that's not saying very much.

16- "Body Like a Back Road" - Sam Hunt (+2) -- Out of all songs to still do well this week despite Drake, why this one? If Sam Hunt breaks top 10 with one of the worst country songs I've heard in a long time, I'm going to be angry. I could agree that country deserves a little more love when it comes to the very top of the charts, but this isn't the song I want breaking the trend.  Keep it away.

21- "Stay" - Zedd & Alessia Cara (+6) -- There's a lot worse things going on right now, so I'll hold my complaints about this one for now. Even if it's a bad Zedd song, it's still good to see Zedd because that means good Zedd still has a chance.

New Arrivals:

8- "Passionfruit" - Drake -- You ready for all of this? Lots and lots of Drake to talk about, so let's get started. Although that YouTube video just above is NOT Drake because he doesn't do the YouTube thing that successfully. But anywho. We start with track No. 3 from Drake's new album. Our highest debuting song is actually the best one on the album, so kudos there. Right off the bat, though, they do a weird thing where they start the beat and after a few seconds, Moodymann comes in saying they need to start the record over as if they messed up. I have no idea why they included that in the intro to the song. But the rest of the song has a bit of a tropical house beat to it with Drake's rap sounding more like pop than rap, which gives this a decent groove. The lyrics aren't anything too special, but compared to most of his lyrics it's not bad. He's talking about his struggles with maintaining a long distance relationship with this girl and thinks they should break things off because it's just not working out. So the intro bothers me and the lyrics are nothing special, but for Drake standards this is passable. I also don't know why he calls the song "Passionfruit" since he doesn't use that word at all in the song.

9- "Portland" - Drake featuring Quavo & Travis Scott -- Track No. 11 from Drake's new album. While I think "Passionfruit" is the best from the album, "Portland" is a complete abomination of a song and is easily the worst song from the album. It's really disgusting and shameful to the music industry that this now has the label of a top 10 hit. This song combines two of my least favorite rappers right now, Drake and Quavo. Drake is boring, emotionless and lazy with his rap while Quavo, and everyone else from Migos, implement the most annoying elements in their rap that is being copied by everyone. That being scattering annoying sound effects and echoes throughout their songs. I consider it a badge of honor that I even made it through this song once because I wanted to gouge my eardrums out the entire time as it started from Drake at his worst and then jumped to Quavo and his extremely annoying brand of rap from Migos. The only slightly positive thing is that Travis Scott had an actual rap verse included that didn't make me hate life while listening. But even his lyrics were pretty tasteless.

18- "Free Smoke" - Drake -- Track No. 1 from Drake's new album. We start the album by Drake talking about how he has come to dominate the rap scene, an unfortunate fact given how lazy and dull his music is. I don't get. But nonetheless, the song starts off interesting with an intro by Nai Palm singing and playing the piano, which almost gave me hope that the album could be better than expected. But then Drake comes in and starts rambling on about how he went to not even being able to pay the bills to being king of the rap world. It's a boring song with no substance. We close with an unintelligible outro by a guy named Baka that leaves us on a weird, sour note.

29- "Gyalchester" - Drake -- Track No. 9 from Drake's new album. This one is also pretty awful. Another situation where I have no idea why he named the song what he did. Drake's not Jamaican, so he shouldn't use the word gyal instead of girl. And what does the "-chester" refer to? Who knows. It's not really referenced in the song. What I do know is the song is yet another rap song that has decided to mimic the horrendous new trend in rap music started by Migos where we use a ton of annoying echoes and noises scattered throughout the song. I hate every song that does this. This is another instance where it completely drags the song down. And this song is pretty low to begin with as Drake's arrogance is at an all time high with him bragging about how famous and awesome he is. The second worst song on the album behind only "Portland."

35- "Teenage Fever" - Drake -- Track No. 14 from Drake's new album. A song that samples Jennifer Lopez' "If You Had My Love." He uses that song's chorus for the chorus in this song and sings around it, turning it into an artificial duet. I mean, the two parts fit together. She's singing a hesitant love song where she obviously has trust issues while he's bitter over their breakup and blaming it all on her while essentially admitting that he can't stop thinking about her while he's hanging out with someone else. Very much like an immature teenage reaction, which he fully admits to and embraces. As you can expect, it doesn't work for me. Now I'm not morally opposed to sampling, but this sampling just feels lazy and out of place, especially since J Lo's sampled chorus is muted when compared to the original, like he's lazily and angrily attacking J Lo. And if he's not doing that, then why didn't he bring on an actual singer to sing with him in the song?

36- "Sacrifices" - Drake featuring 2 Chainz & Young Thug -- Track No. 12 from Drake's new album. In this song Drake claims he wrote this song on January 21? Ummm... happy birthday to me? But not really, because this would be a pathetic birthday present. Coming straight after "Portland," the positive here is that this is listenable. I don't hate life while forcing myself to listen to the whole song. But this song is just boring. Something about sacrifices is what made Drake famous, which is cool and all, but sounds more hollow than anything when you look at the lyrics. A lot of sports references and stuff scattered throughout. We do get a break from Drake for the last two-thirds of the song, but 2 Chainz and Young Thug sound just as bored as Drake is on the track and the flow is just as lifeless, so it's not really much of a break. Just a song that would put me to sleep.

38- "Blem" - Drake -- Track No. 7 from Drake's new album. And in figuring out what in the heck blem means, I learned it may be slang for being high on marijuana. So then in that context, the main line here is "I'm blem for real, I might just say how I feel." Meaning he's only going to tell the truth to this girl when he's high? Is that what he's getting at? If so, no wonder the girl doesn't want to talk to him and keeps going back to her ex. Yet Drake blames it all on her being crazy. Just Drake being dumb again. The song doesn't hurt my eardrums, but when I try to figure it all out, I just roll my eyes at how lazy and dumb Drake is with his music.

40- "No Long Talk" - Drake featuring Giggs -- Track No. 2 from Drake's new album. This one features British rapper Giggs, who I've not heard of until now as this is one of two features he has on Drake's album. A bit of research taught me that he's had four studio albums, the most recent one released last August and sold quite well over in the U.K. While it would be unfair of me to judge his previous work with this being the first song I've heard from him, based on this I'm not super interesting in looking him up. This song does have a darker, more intense production which may have made the song work if the lyrics were even remotely interesting. Drake and Giggs each get half of the song. Drake's first half, I don't even know what he's talking about. Giggs' second half is more interesting as far as the flow and the passion goes. It seems like he actually cares, but I still don't know what he's talking about or why the song is even called "No Long Talk," so I don't really care for this.

45- "Get it Together" - Drake featuring Jorja Smith & Black Coffee -- Track No. 5 from Drake's new album. The song that "Jorja's Interlude" sets up, which I'll talk about in a second. And this is actually a decent song... until Drake shows up. The reason that this a decent song is that most of this song samples a great song called "Superman" by a South African DJ named Black Coffee featuring vocals from a South African singer named Bucie. The lyrics of "Superman" and the lyrics of "Get it Together" are almost the exact same. The girl is singing that she's been hurt so many times that she needs someone to hold her and love her. In the "Superman" version of the song, she then sings that she needs a guy to come be her Superman. In the "Get it Together" version, Drake cuts in and simply says that she needs him to get his *crap* together so they can be together. Jorja Smith does a decent job singing Bucie's lyrics, but Drake's chorus feels so out of place. Good sampling work has been done in the past, but this is an example of sampling a great song and completely butchering it, thus I give Drake zero credit for this travesty. Although I do thank him for introducing me to the original, so take that for what it's worth.

48- "KMT" - Drake featuring Giggs -- Track No. 15 from Drake's new album. This is the second song on the album that features British rapper Giggs, the first being track No. 2, "No Long Talk." Much like in the other song, Giggs actually seems to care a lot more than Drake about this song. Drake's half of the song is him doing more boring complaining about breaking up with some girl and claiming he's moved. I'm trying to figure out why it's called "KMT" and all I can come up with is the final line of Drake's verse that says "kissin' my teeth." Say what? Giggs comes in and is much more interesting, but has no substance outside him talking about girls in a creepy, perverted way and something about money and a Batman reference at the end? I'm just going to move on.

49- "Jorja Interlude" - Drake -- Track No. 4 from Drake's new album. And this one is barely a song. It's less than two minutes long as it only has one verse from Drake and a short refrain from Jorja Smith, who plays an major role on the ensuing track "Get it Together" that I just talked about, hence the name "Jorja Interlude." A song like this is more track filler to introduce the next song and shouldn't be a song that debuts on the charts. Drake's verse is boring and on this interlude song, Jorja Smith has a voice in such a high register that you have no idea what she's saying. Pointless song.

50- "4422" - Drake featuring Sampha -- Track No. 8 from Drake's new album. The weird thing about this song is that it is listed as "Drake featuring Sampha," but there is no Drake on this song, so I don't know why we are calling this a Drake song or why it's even on the album. Since Drake and Sampha collaborated twice in the past, perhaps Drake called up Sampha and asked if he wanted to write and sing a song for his new album. Drake would take full credit for the song, but it would put Sampha on the map again with a feature credit, so it was agreed to. That's how I imagine things went. Anyways, it has been suggested that this song refers to the scripture Isaiah 44:22, which is God telling someone he has forgiven them and wants them to return. That context makes sense since Sampha is talking to someone saying they claim they've changed, but never have. It's better for my ears to listen to Sampha rather than Drake, but the majority of this song is Sampha repeating same two lines over and over in between a short intro and outro. Like Sampha had an idea for 30 seconds of a song that was instead stretched to three minutes because Drake didn't want to add anything to it.

51- "Madiba Riddim" - Drake -- Track No. 6 from Drake's new album. A song that's not awful. It has a groove similar to that of a poor man's "One Dance." In other words, a lesser version of Drake's biggest career hit. The lyrics aren't awful, but they're also fairly shallow. He's just having a hard time discerning between who are his real friends and who are his friends because he's famous. In other words, he's finding a dumb way to complain about being famous that comes off as a bit arrogant towards those who are actually trying to make good music but can't find success while Drake doesn't seem to even try and gets super successful anyways and still finds ways to complain. So yeah, I don't dig this. And I don't know why it's called "Madiba Riddim." But there's worse on the album.

54- "Glow" - Drake featuring Kanye West -- Track No. 18 on Drake's new album. And what a joy it is to have my two least favorite rappers together on one track. Yes, that was sarcastic. The positive here is that these two have done a whole lot worse. Every time I see Kanye on a track these days I brace for the worst and, while I very rarely get anything worth anything, it's somewhat nice when he doesn't deliver absolute dog crap. But yeah, both of them are just rapping about how awesome they are. I don't care to count how many times on this album Drake has spent bragging about his fame and how he's the best rapper on the planet. I don't get why this subject matter is interesting to anyone. I get annoyed with overly cocky people. But I guess this is cool music these days?

60- "Do Not Disturb" - Drake -- Track No. 22 on Drake's new album. The final track on the album. And it's one giant verse with no flow and nothing interesting going on. A lame way to end a lame album that I'm really upset was able to chart every single song. That's all I have to say about this one. And perhaps I'll add for the heck of it that Drake should just not disturb me in the future. I wish he would just go away, but he'll probably be back later this year or early next year with yet another album that will chart all of its tracks, unless Billboard does something in the meantime to prevent that from happening.

61- "Nothings Into Somethings" - Drake -- Track No. 13 from Drake's new album. And man this song drags. Not helping the fact is that Drake sounds bored and depressed as he's complaining that his former love interest has now announced her engagement to someone and wouldn't even give him the decency of letting him know as he found out through a friend. This is a subject matter that Drake could've made something interesting out of, but he doesn't. As I said, the song drags and Drake is singing super slow. Then the song just ends. Two short verses with a chorus consisting of a lot of nah-nah-nah's. The only reason why this barely tops two and half minutes is the dragged on instrumentals. So yeah, there's literally like nothing here.

62- "Ice Melts" - Drake featuring Young Thug -- Track No. 21 on Drake's new album. And if you're jumping around following this track by track and suddenly you're wondering where track No. 20 went, that track is "Fake Love," which debuted towards the end of last year. I included it on the rising songs section. Track No. 21 is the second time Young Thug shows up on the album. And for the record, I really don't know why someone would choose to name themselves "Young Thug." It's a really dumb rap name. And no surprise that I don't think I've ever heard an intelligent song or verse coming from Young Thug. I don't get the appeal. Him and Drake inform us in this song that ice melts. Did you know that? I mean, who would've thunk it? Yeah, I think I've lost my sanity here. It doesn't help when this is the upteenth time Drake is whining about a failed relationship. He's begging her to let the ice melt between them and give him a second chance. But he's really not making much of an effort to prove that it would be a worthwhile second chance. He just hates being lonely, so it's all hollow.

64- "Lose You" - Drake -- Track No. 16 from Drake's new album. This is the third longest song on the album and the longest song that features only Drake, so it's the song where he has the most to say. Although none of it is even interesting. Just two long verses both followed by a short chorus of him asking "Did I lose you?" a few times. I got bored halfway through this song because Drake was too boring here. I glanced over the rest of the lyrics to see if I missed anything from the second verse and nope. Just boring old Drake music.

70- "Since Way Back" - Drake featuring PARTYNEXTDOOR -- Track No. 19 on Drake's new album. This one includes Drake and Drake wannabe, Mr. PARTYNEXTDOOR. Who is going to be the most boring and lifeless person on this track? It's hard to tell. I think Drake called up PARTYNEXTDOOR and challenged him to see which of the two could be the most boring and dull in a collaboration and I think they tied. Not helping things is that this song is over six minutes long. Because... why? And it drags like crazy.

76- "Skepta Interlude" - Drake -- Track No. 10 from Drake's new album. Drake has done an interesting thing by featuring a lot of British rappers and singers. Drake has apparently been a fan of Skepta for a while, so I guess he wanted a Skepta song on his album. This is one of a couple of songs that has no Drake on it. Yes, this song is 100 percent Skepta. So I'm judging this as a Skepta song, not a Drake song. Which is funny because in this instance, Drake decided not to even list Skepta as a featured artist. He's just in the title. Being that I've never heard a previous song from Skepta, this is brand new territory for me. I'm also not super familiar with a musical genre called Grime, but apparently that is what this is and with Drake featuring a lot of British rappers, I'm gathering that he's trying to popularize that genre over here. I will say that Skepta is more interesting than Drake. That said, this song has a lot of interesting references, some that I understand and am confused as to why they are here and some that I don't understand probably because I know nothing of the urban lifestyle in London. Perhaps some will like this and be glad that Drake brought it over, but in my opinion I think this and Skepta should probably stay over there in the U.K. It's better than Drake, but I still don't like it.

82- "Can't Have Everything" - Drake -- Track No. 17 from Drake's new album. And since I actually went through this album in order, and did so over the course of several different sittings, this is where I really started to get tired of this album and wanted to be done. But I decided to be objective anyways and endure to the final track. But this didn't help because Drake is just rambling on about how he wants everything, but he can't have everything. The one thing interesting in this song is that the outro is a bit from a lady named Sandi Graham that is talking to Drake (yes, talking -- not singing) saying she's concerned about his negative tone these days and gives him some advice on how she thinks he should be living. It sounded a lot like motherly advice to Drake, so I looked her up. And yes, Sandi Graham is in fact Drake's mother. So yeah, he included some actual advice to him from his mother. That's an interesting thing to do.

88- "At My Best" - Machine Gun Kelly featuring Hailee Steinfeld -- We'll end our long list of new arrivals this week with three songs NOT from Drake. And perhaps it's because I just put myself through 21 new Drake songs, but listening to this song was like a breath of fresh air. A rapper who writes lyrics he seems to actually care about that gives a good flow intermixed with a chorus from a pop singer with a great voice. This I can get behind. Now Machine Gun Kelly previously collaborated with Camila Cabello on "Bad Things," a song that a lot of people hate. I'm not madly in love with the song, but I'm not among the group of haters. Machine Gun Kelly has proven to be a tolerable rapper for me. In "At My Best," his rap is an attempt to be inspirational. He wants to help others who are going through a hard time and he encourages them to keep their head up and keep moving forward. He doesn't dive into any specifics, so I don't know if this is a song that people will latch onto, but it's certainly a lot better than all this Drake crap I had to wade through this week. There's not a whole lot of Hailee Steinfeld in this song. She's just there so we have a bit of a pop balance on the song instead of it being all Machine Gun Kelly, which is probably a good thing.

97- "Trap Trap Trap" - Rick Ross featuring Young Thug & Wale -- It's probably bad timing on the part of Rick Ross to release his album at the same time as Drake. Had he waited a week or two, perhaps he could've had more albums chart on the Billboard Hot 100 and at a higher position than No. 97. But let's all take a moment and thank whoever made this bad decision because I would hate to have to cover a whole ton of Rick Ross. I'll cover the songs if more of them show up in the future, but based on this I'm not even going to get close to this album of his. This song is pretty bad. Rick Ross isn't boring and dull like Drake is, but he's not interesting to listen to at all. In addition to repeating the word trap over and over in his chorus and giving a verse that I don't know what he's talking about, we also have two awful verses from Young Thug and Wale that weren't pleasant.

98- "Swalla" - Jason Derulo featuring Nicki Minaj & Ty Dolla $ign -- Every once in a while Jason Derulo releases a fun, catchy pop song. But those are few and far between. In fact, I can't even remember off the top of my head the last time I enjoyed a Jason Derulo. He's been mostly tasteless and annoying as of late and I'm also glad he's had a hard time getting back into the top 10. Let's hope this song continues his losing streak. It has a fun groove to it that makes it more tolerable than a lot of the garbage from this week, but that's it. Nick Minaj, who proved last week that it's possible for her to write songs that I don't hate, is at her absolute worst in this song. Ty Dolla $ign is barely in the song (thank you), but is so forgetable that by the end of the song I forgot he was in it. And Jason Derulo is outright annoying with a lot of "shimmy shimmy yay" and "swalla-la-la" festering throughout the song that I hope doesn't catch on. Let's hope this song quickly dies.

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

DrogeMiester's Billboard Analysis - April 1, 2017

The new Billboard charts have arrived and so it's time again for me to give you my thoughts! In this weekly post, I cover three sections. First, I give my thoughts on the top 10 of the Billboard Hot 100. Second, I give my thoughts on the songs that experienced significant gains below the top 10. Third, I give my initial thoughts on our new arrivals this week. I may decide to switch things up in the future, but for now this is what I'm sticking with. I've followed the Billboard charts for a long time now and this is a great way for me to express my thoughts to the world. I hope you enjoy!

Billboard Hot 100 Top 10:

1- "Shape of You" - Ed Sheeran (=) -- It's eight weeks at No. 1 for Ed Sheeran. And he's now got actual competition for the top spot with Bruno jumping up to No. 2. Well, kinda. Ed is still way ahead of him in streaming and radio, even if the sales for the two songs aren't too far off. At this point, I'll predict 10-12 weeks for "Shape of You" at No. 1 unless something else comes out of nowhere.

2- "That's What I Like" - Bruno Mars (+1) -- Now the question will be who is going to have more staying power at the top of the charts? Bruno has a lot of momentum right now, but Ed is still a huge powerhouse. If Bruno can remain consistent enough to still be strong until Ed starts to fall, we could be looking at our next No. 1 hit. But there's also a chance that this could be the next song to get stuck at that No. 2 spot.

3- "Bad and Boujee" - Migos featuring Lil Uzi Vert (-1) -- Let's all shout a cry of relief that Migos has dropped a spot on the charts! I'll take what I can get right now. Although it would be really nice if this could fall faster. There's just not a whole lot of competition on the charts right now to shove this out of the way. Let's hope more rises. More good, anyways. Not Nicki or Drake. Let's not open the door for those two to dominate in the top 10.

4- "I Don't Wanna Live Forever (Fifty Shades Darker)" - Zayn & Taylor Swift (=) -- I thought this song might have a chance to move up a spot due to its iTunes discount, but the result of that was that it had enough power to fend off the songs right below it that are begging to sneak into the top five.

5- "I Feel it Coming" - The Weeknd featuring Daft Punk (+7) -- Here's a welcome addition! And speaking of iTunes discount, that's exactly what allowed this song to jump into the top five. That and its new music video. Now I just hope it can gain more traction and stick around in the top five. It would be great if this was our next No. 1 hit. That might be wishful thinking at this point, but we shall see.

6- "Tunnel Vision" - Kodak Black (=) -- This stays at No. 6. Good. I don't mind this hanging around for a bit in the bottom half of the top 10, but I would get upset if it snuck into the top five and camped out there. Although I have a sneaking suspicion that that's exactly what's going to happen due mainly to the weakness of some of the other songs around it.

7- "Love on the Brain" - Rihanna (-2) -- Rihanna, where's your music video? If this song is never promoted, we can chalk it up to a bit of a missed opportunity. I won't be upset, though. Rihanna doesn't need another No. 1 hit. She's had plenty of them. But I'm just saying.

8- "Something Just Like This" - The Chainsmokers & Coldplay (+3) -- It's back! And it's slowly gaining more traction on all metrics, so thankfully it looks like this is here to stay. "Paris" is still stronger on radio, but "Something Just Like This" is rising on radio and is having consistently good sales. I expect a top five reappearance before too long.

9- "Paris" - The Chainsmokers (-2) -- And speaking of The Chainsmokers, they've now spent 46 consecutive weeks in the top 10. I won't do a weekly accounting on that, just an occasional reminder to see how close The Chainsmokers can get to Katy Perry's 2010-2011 record of 69 consecutive weeks for an artist in the top 10. Drake had 51 weeks from 2015-2016, Ace of Base had 48 weeks from 1993-1994 and The Chainsmokers are tied with Rihanna for fourth place with the aforementioned 46 weeks. But for the first time in eight months, "Closer" is not in the top 10. Barring one final resurgence, which I'm not expecting to happen, it appears that "Closer" will remain tied with LeAnn Rimes' "How Do I Live" for the all-time record that one single song has spent in the top 10.

10- "iSpy" - KYLE featuring Lil Yachty (+4) -- I saw this coming, so no surprise here. It's this year's "Broccoli," especially since both songs feature Lil Yachty attached to a song led by a rapper you've never heard of, but probably will hear of a lot more given the success of this song. Also like "Broccoli," this is a unique, catchy rap song, although I was a heck of a lot more repulsed by the lyrics of "Broccoli" than I am of "iSpy." So this is tolerable. It's not good by any means, but I suppose I'm fine with this being around as long as it doesn't get too high.

Rising on the Hot 100:

16- "Cold" - Maroon 5 featuring Future (+4) -- A lot of songs rose this week due to the natural fallout of the 10 Ed Sheeran songs that debuted last week after the arrival of his new album. The least of which might be this. Truth be told, this song is so forgettable that I can't even think of the tune off the top of my head. At least I can do that with "Don't Wanna Know." And I have a dreading suspicion this is heading for the top 10 for some reason that is beyond me.

19- "Mask Off" - Future (+13) -- And why in the heck is this continuing to skyrocket up the charts? If Future ends up with two concurrent top 10 hits, I might throw a fit. The fact that he has two top 20 hits is bad enough.

21- "Say You Won't Let Go" - James Arthur (+7) -- James Arthur has almost hit the top 20 here in the U.S. after celebrating a No. 1 hit in the U.K. quite some time ago. It's also gone No. 1 in Australia, Ireland, Netherlands, New Zealand, Scotland and Sweden, so we're a little late to the party. It has continued momentum, though, so we'll see how high it can get.

27- "Stay" - Zedd & Alessia Cara (+7) -- You think I'd be happier for this given the two artists involved. I guess whatever traction Zedd can get is positive given that it keeps the door open for future success. But as I said two weeks ago when this debuted, there's a lot of Zedd songs out there that are much better than this.

34- "Rolex" - Ayo & Teo (+14) -- This is eventually going top 10, too, isn't it? I just hope its momentum can be stopped, but I'm not counting on it.

37- "Dirt on My Boots" - Jon Pardi (+5) -- The biggest gainer in the country world this week. I suppose this would be a better top country song than "Body Like a Back Road" if it can catch up to that song, but that's not saying very much.

44- "Party" - Chris Brown (+7) -- This song can't make up its mind, so allow me to make up its mind for it. GO AWAY!!!

46- "How Far I'll Go" - Auli'i Cravalho (+14) -- The Oscar boost continues? Or is this due to the DVD release? Probably the latter. That would make more sense. But I continue to be impressed with how much staying power the "Moana" soundtrack is having on the charts.

56- "Redbone" - Childish Gambino (+13) -- Can Mr. Glover hit top 50 with this song? I'd be down for that.

58- "Play That Song" - Train (+10) -- Here's a nice surprise. I thought this song was dead. And many people would've been happy if it stayed dead because hating Train is the cool thing to do these days. I still find this to be a fun song, though, even though I got really bored of the new album.

68- "In Case You Didn't Know" - Brett Young (+12) -- Now this needs to be our top country song! Let's hope it can continue to gain momentum and hit the top 50. Let's get that Sam Hunt song dethroned from the top of the country charts!

69- "Heavy" - Linkin Park featuring Kiiara (+10) -- I never envisioned myself saying this, but I hope this Linkin Park song burns and dies. Let's not encourage Linkin Park to go the route of Marroon 5 with their music. That would be awful.

76- "How Far I'll Go" - Alessia Cara (+13) -- Speaking of "Moana." This song is still here. I don't bring up re-entries, but "You're Welcome" also reappeared at the bottom of the charts this week.

81- "Hometown Girl" - Josh Turner (+14) -- I envision much success for this song in its future. This seems like the song that will catch on with country radio. Which is a shame, really. But oh well. Not bad, but there's a lot better.

New Arrivals:

14- "No Frauds" - Nicki Minaj, Drake & Lil Wayne -- I hate it when Nicki shows up on the charts. I want her to disappear from the world of music, but we can't let her go and now she has THREE new songs this week. So now we're going to play this game of seeing how long my ears can tolerate each of these songs. First song up is "No Frauds" and so far so good. I actually went the whole song without wanting to gouge my eardrums out. Yes, that's my scale when it comes to Nicki songs. I hate her that much. So the fact that I didn't absolutely hate this song with a fiery passion is a good thing, I guess. She's done much worse. I think the hook of this song is actually decent. It's the three verses where it goes wrong and each of our lovely rappers collaborating get exactly one verse. The best of which is Lil Wayne. The worst is a toss-up. More facepalms at the lyrics in Nicki's verse, but absolutely no life in Drake's verse. Speaking of Drake, he dropped yet another album this week, which means I'll be spending a lot of time covering it next week. I'm not excited for that.

61- "Regret in Your Tears" - Nicki Minaj -- Every once in a while Nicki decides to sing a song that is less rap and more pop. That rarely happens, but when it does it's a whole heck of a lot more tolerable. See, as a rapper she comes off as arrogant, annoying and filthy. Like someone who thinks she's super cool, but is the exact opposite. When she's trying to be more like Beyonce or Rihanna, it's still not good, but it's tolerable. And that's what this is. She's actually trying to be more emotional by talking about a recent breakup. She's a lot softer as she's holding back from her usual arrogant tone and it kinda works. She still screws things up by making some facepalm-worthy statements in her verses, but for Nicki's standards, this isn't bad at all.

71- "Changed It" - Nicki Minaj & Lil Wayne -- We went two for two so far without me hating life while listening to a Nicki song. Part of me wondered if we were going three for three. But no. Not so lucky. Sure, I've listened to Nicki songs and Lil Wayne songs that are a lot more repulsive and disgusting, but this here is exemplifies the worst of both Lil Wayne and Nicki. Both are as cocky and arrogant as ever with them bragging about how awesome they are and how much they've influenced others. The only slightly saving grace is that this song is mostly Lil Wayne with only a touch of Nicki.

72- "Chanel" - Frank Ocean -- Hallelujah! We're done with Nicki for the week! Although in an odd turn of events, the first two Nicki songs are actually better than this pile of garbage by Frank Ocean. There's absolutely no life to this song. Just three really long verses with no flow or rhythm connected with a two ling chorus and a brief bridge. I can't say I'm the biggest fan of Frank Ocean, but I do know he's done way better than this in the past.

78- "Liability" - Lorde -- Holy fire!!! I absolutely loved "Green Light" and I love this song even more. If this is what we have in store for Lorde's second album "Liability," then I am pumped. Lorde has been classified as rock in the past. "Royals" was on top of the rock charts for a really long time. I don't think that makes much sense. Lorde is kinda her own unique genre, but this song here is straight up piano ballad and it's gorgeous. Lorde is super vulnerable in this song talking about how hurt she is that she can't find romance. They get what they want out of her, then they leave her out in the cold, making her hurt and depressed and giving her the mindset that she's only a liability to other people. I can't even do it justice with this explanation, but this is excellent. I get a lump in my throat and goosebumps everywhere while listening to it. One of the best songs of the year, if not the best song so far.

95- "Prblms" - 6LACK -- He forgot to include the vowels in the song title. And his rap name is supposed to pronounced as "black," but spelled with a "6" instead of a "b." That kind of stupid thing makes me not even want to give this song the time of day as it oozes of an unintelligent punk just wanting to be cool. The kicker is that his real name is Ricardo Valentine, which has a good ring to it. Sure that sounds more like a Latino singer and not a black rapper, but hey. A name's a name. And after such a masterpiece with Lorde's "Liability" I almost just want to leave it at that and never listen to another song again. But OK. I'll talk about this song. And yeah, it's as awful as it sounds. This guy sounds like a bad combination of Drake, Future and 21 Savage. Awful lazy rap that drags on like crazy and is barely comprehensible. And he's talking about these problems (yes, that's how you spell it Six-Lack) he's having with the girl, but he's bragging that he's done absolutely nothing wrong and that it's all her fault. Yeah, that's a genius way to look at things. Horrendous. We went from one of the best of the year to one of the worst of the year in just two songs. Ouch.

Friday, March 17, 2017

DrogeMiesters Top 30 Disney Songs (2017 Update)

Five years ago my roommates and I were up well into the night talking about all things Disney. A very manly thing to do, might I add. This caused me to create a list of my top 30 favorite Disney songs. Granted, that was the first time I had done such a music list and if I'm being honest it was fairly rushed and didn't account for well over half of the Disney songs out there. I just thought of a handful of Disney songs that I really loved and created a list to put out. I posted that on my main movie blog. In fact, it was among the first posts I did on that blog as it was just the third month of that blog's existence.

I've always had a desire to redo that list in a more thorough fashion, but the idea stayed in the back of my mind until last year when I re-watched all 55 movies in Disney's official animated cannon in preparation for my list of my favorite Disney movies that I released last May. Given that all the movies were fresh on my mind, it seems like the perfect opportunity to go back and redo the list of songs as well. However, knowing that "Moana" was coming up late in the year and was to be another full-out musical, I decided it would be best to wait a little longer. But now that "Moana" has come and gone and I've given it plenty of time to simmer in my mind, it's time to dive in and get this done. And what better weekend to release this than on the weekend where Disney's latest live-action remake, "Beauty and the Beast," hits theaters?

Before we begin, some parameters for this need to be established:

1- The songs had to be from a movie in the official Walt Disney Animation Studios cannon. Not Pixar. Not DisneyToon. And not just any movie distributed by Disney. Walt Disney Animation Studios. There is a difference. Sorry "Toy Story," "A Goofy Movie," "Marry Poppins" and more. You weren't eligible for this.

2- The songs had to be specifically written for the movie to be considered. As fun as it would be to include the Elvis songs from "Lilo & Stitch" or something similar to that, that seemed unfair. If they weren't Disney songs first, then it felt wrong to include them. They didn't necessarily need to be sung by a character in the movie and if the song only showed up in the credits that was fine, too. Just as long as they were songs written for a Disney movie.

3- I only considered soundtrack and not score. If I have my musical terminology wrong on that, I apologize. In layman's terms, the songs needed lyrics. Best Disney score would be a fun subject to dive into sometime, but not here.

4- The song had to be longer than a minute. "Alice in Wonderland" and "Winnie the Pooh" are movies that are especially good at having songs ranging from 30-45 seconds long. I disqualified all of those. I preferred longer than two minutes as well so that they were full-length songs instead of instances I termed as brief musical moments, but the cutoff was a minute.

5- Finally, given that there are a lot of great Disney songs that are hard to sort out, I tended to give precedence to songs that were deep, emotional, and had more impact on the plot of the film. Those are the songs that hit me the hardest. But that's not to say there's no place for fun, well-written songs or excellent villain songs. There's plenty of those that were super high. I just prefer the songs that have depth and meaning to them.

With all of that out of the way, let's dive in! As a final note, much like every Disney movie has a passionate fan base that thinks that movie is the best movie, just about every song has a similar fan base that think that's the best Disney song. And given that there's over 200 of them, not every song could be No. 1 or even be included on the list. So don't be heartbroken if I didn't put your song at the top. This is my list. And I went through every movie and listened to every song in each movie, then started a rigorous, complex ranking system to come up with what I considered my personal favorites. And I feel comfortable with what I've come up with, so I hope you enjoy!

30- "Belle" - Beauty and the Beast

29- "The Phony King of England" - Robin Hood

28- "Some Day My Prince Will Come" - Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

27- "Go the Distance" - Hercules

26- "When You Wish Upon a Star" - Pinocchio

25- "A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes" - Cinderella

24- "I've Got a Dream" - Tangled

23- "Zero to Hero" - Hercules

22- "Heigh-Ho" - Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

21- "Love" - Robin Hood

20- "I'll Make a Man Out of You" - Mulan

19- "Almost There" - Princess and the Frog

18- "Let it Go" - Frozen

17- "Prince Ali" - Aladdin

16- "Part of Your World" - The Little Mermaid

15- "Circle of Life" - The Lion King

14- "God Help the Outcasts" - The Hunchback of Notre Dame

13- "Someone's Waiting for You" - The Rescuers

12- "The Silly Song (The Dwarfs' Yodel Song)" - Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

11- "The Bare Necessities" - The Jungle Book

10- "Little Wonders" - Meet the Robinsons

9- "The Mob Song" - Beauty and the Beast

8- "Savages" - Pocahontas

7- "A Whole New World" - Aladdin

6- "I See the Light" - Tangled

5- "Heaven's Light / Hellfire" - The Hunchback of Notre Dame

4- "Be Prepared" - The Lion King

3- "You'll Be in My Heart" - Tarzan

2- "Beauty and the Beast" - Beauty and the Beast

1- "Colors of the Wind" - Pocahontas

Thursday, March 16, 2017

DrogeMiester's Billboard Analysis - March 25, 2017

The new Billboard charts have arrived and so it's time again for me to give you my thoughts! In this weekly post, I cover three sections. First, I give my thoughts on the top 10 of the Billboard Hot 100. Second, I give my thoughts on the songs that experienced significant gains below the top 10. Third, I give my initial thoughts on our new arrivals this week. I may decide to switch things up in the future, but for now this is what I'm sticking with. I've followed the Billboard charts for a long time now and this is a great way for me to express my thoughts to the world. I hope you enjoy!

Billboard Hot 100 Top 10:

1- "Shape of You" - Ed Sheeran (=) -- It's an Ed Sheeran sort of week. As Ed claims his seventh week at No. 1, he officially claims the top spot on all three of Billboard's tracking metrics: sales, streaming and radio. Not just that, though, with the arrival of his new album taking effect on the charts this week, he debuts 10 additional songs on the charts this week, meaning all 12 of the songs from his regular album have debuted on the charts as well as one of the four from the deluxe version of the album. Confirmation that Ed Sheeran has achieved superstar status.

2- "Bad and Boujee" - Migos featuring Lil Uzi Vert (=) -- Can this song please die? Ed took the lead on streaming, which is the only thing this song has going for it, but the streaming for this song is still insanely high. I don't get it. It's now spent a total of seven weeks at No. 2 for a grand total of 10 weeks in the top two and 11 weeks in the top three. This is a travesty in my opinion.

3- "That's What I Like" - Bruno Mars (+1) -- Bruno snuck by Zayn and Taylor this week, meaning this song has officially charted higher than "24K Magic," which peaked at No. 4. Now can it go higher and take that No. 2 spot away from "Bad and Boujee"? I'm not a huge fan of this song, but I would much rather have it at No. 2 than "Bad and Boujee."

4- "I Don't Wanna Live Forever (Fifty Shades Darker)" - Zayn & Taylor Swift (-1) -- Once this song goes away, I can officially give you my list of the top 100 Billboard hits of all-time according to my system. Maybe that's motivation for us all to hope for this song's demise?

5- "Love on the Brain" - Rihanna (+1) -- Rihanna now has her 22nd top five hit in her career, officially passing Elvis Presley for fifth place all time in that category. The four artists ahead of her are The Beatles (29), Madonna (28), Mariah Carey (26) and Janet Jackson (24). And this might be Rihanna's easiest top five hit yet as she still hasn't even released a lyric video or done much promotion for it at all. Her team just released it as a single and the radio fell madly in love. Perhaps more has gone on behind the scenes. I don't actually know. But that's what it seems like.

6- "Tunnel Vision" - Kodak Black (+2) -- How high can a song get with no radio and no sales? This song has huge streaming and that's essentially it. That's the story for a lot of rap songs these days, though, as "Bad and Boujee" is currently proving.

7- " Paris" - The Chainsmokers (=) -- "Something Just Like This" bows out of the top 10 for now while "Paris" remains consistent. That's kinda what I expected. Although I'm expecting "Something Just Like This" to come back as soon as possibly next week as it's currently sitting at No. 11 right now after soaring up to No. 5 last week.

8- "Bounce Back" - Big Sean (+1) -- How many times can use the bounce back play on words to talk about this song before it gets on people's nerves?

9- "Rockabye" - Clean Bandit featuring Sean Paul & Anne-Marie (+15) -- Wahoo!!!! Clean Bandit logs their second ever top 10 hit in the U.S. as "Rockabye" tops "Rather Be," which tragically peaked at No. 10 (should've gone a lot higher). "Rockabye" is here due to a huge spike in sales following an iTunes discount, which most songs strategically implement these days and in this case it resulted in a top 10 hit for Clean Bandit. It's probably gone next week, but hey! At least it got one week in the top 10 as this is one of the best songs currently on the charts. I don't know why we haven't embraced Clean Bandit more here in the U.S.

10- "Closer" - The Chainsmokers (=) -- It did it. The Chainsmokers have tied LeAnn Rimes for the longest a song has ever stayed in the top 10 in the nearly 60 year history of the Billboard Hot 100, which is arguably the most impressive record that you can have. It's one thing to hit gold and get a ton of weeks at No. 1. It's another to remain consistent on the charts for this long. Both "Closer" and "How Do I Live" have 32 weeks in the top 10, which is approximately eight months on the charts. "Closer" was released on July 29 of last year. We're now in mid-March and it's still here. And it's spent all 32 of those weeks in the top 10. Love it or hate it, we've been witnessing one of the most impressive streaks in Billboard history. There's a really good chance this is the last week for "Closer" as a few songs right under it are having great sales weeks. But all it has to do is surprise us one final week and it will have the record all to itself. Can it do it?

Rising on the Hot 100:

15- "Mercy" - Shawn Mendes (+2) -- "Mercy" has been very slowly climbing the charts and it's not too far away from giving Shawn Mendes another top 10 hit. I'm kinda hoping it stalls. Even though the song is a bit better than Mendes' previous works, at this point I'm morally opposed to Mendes achieving any more success with his mediocre music.

17- "Body Like a Back Road" - Sam Hunt (+3) -- What the freaking heck is going on here? Why in the world is one of the worst country songs I've heard having one of the best runs for a country song. Country songs rarely ever hit the top 10. If this breaks that streak, I'm going to throw a fit.

18- "It Ain't Me" - Kygo & Selena Gomez (+4) -- I'm happy to see a rise this week for this song. That's a good promise for its future after having an enormous debut and dipping down right after. I like Selena when she's not trying to prove to the world that she's now an adult. We get it. And Kygo is one of my favorite EDM artists. I love his tropical house style. He deserves mainstream status with the consistently good music he's put out and I hope this is his big break.

19- "Green Light" - Lorde (+81) -- Lorde skyrockets up the charts after getting her first full week of sales. "Green Light" debuted last week at No. 100 after a day on the charts, so you can essentially call this it's real debut. As is the case with most big debuts, this week experience a dive on the charts next week. Let's just hope this gains enough traction with radio and streaming so next week isn't too harsh and this can become a hit for Lorde leading up to her new album coming shortly. I would love to see Lorde at the top of the charts again, especially since this song is pretty great!

20- "Cold" - Maroon 5 featuring Future (+12) -- This can go away, though. Neither Maroon 5 nor Future deserve another top 10 hit. Keep this away!

32- "Mask Off" - Future (+14) -- Out of all of Future's new debuts on the charts in the last two weeks, why is this the one that's catching on? None of them were that good, but this one one of the worst. Why do we accept awful music today? Can't we reject awful music for once?

38- "Location" - Khalid (+13) -- Quietly becoming a hit is Khalid's "Location" as it hits top 40 for the first time this week. And I'm down with that. Now I'm just curious if this gets stuck in the 20's and 30's or if it can breakout and get higher. We shall see!

39- "Castle on the Hill" - Ed Sheeran (+36) -- Boosted by the Ed Sheeran week is "Castle on the Hill"! I wish this would stick around because it's the best song from his album that we're about to dive into here in a second!

41- "Believer" - Imagine Dragons (+18) -- Can Imagine Dragons conjure up a hit after coming up completely blank in their second album? This is a very sub-par Imagine Dragons song, but if it means they catch on again and gain traction on the charts like the did with their first album, then I'm all for it!

46- "Make Me (Cry)" - Noah Cyrus featuring Labrinth (+10) -- Here's a song that can't decide what it wants to do. One week I think it's going to start climbing high, the other week I think it's heading off the charts. I wish it would do the latter, because this is a really annoying song. Although speaking of Miley's little sister, Noah has a new collaboration with Marshmello and Ookay called "Chasing Colors" that debuted on the EDM charts last week that I think is fairly decent. I'd be fine with that crossing over to the Billboard Hot 100. It's better than this song.

48- "Rolex" - Ayo & Teo (+12) -- This song better not become a hit. Let's stop it before it gets too high.

69- "Redbone" - Childish Gambino (+14) -- I don't think I've actually had the opportunity of talking about Childish Gambino on this new segment. I can't say that I'm madly in love with this particular song, but it has a nice little groove to it and I'd be happy if it actually caught on because it's been mostly in flux on the bottom half of the Hot 100 since debuting a while ago. But I will say I've been super impressed with the career of Mr. Donald Glover. I'm sure you already know, but he was one of the stars on the TV show "Community" and his film career has started to take off. In addition to a few small roles here and there, he has recently been cast as our new Lando Calrissian in our upcoming Han Solo movie as well as the voice of Simba in Jon Favreau's upcoming live-action remake of "The Lion King." Doing all that as well as having a successful music career under the stage name of Childish Gambino is super impressive. How many people can say they've been a TV star, movie star and music star essentially at the same time?

New Arrivals:

37- "Perfect" - Ed Sheeran -- The rest of this week's analysis will essentially be an album review of Ed Sheeran's "÷" album. Because, guess what? As I previously stated, he has 10 new debuts. And those 10 debuts are the only songs that debuted this week. Nothing from anyone else. Just 10 Ed Sheeran songs. I'm almost tempted to go in the order that they showed up on the album, but I will cover them in the order of how they arrived on the charts. We Start out with "Perfect," which is in the vein of "How Do I Feel (Paean)," which showed up two weeks ago on the charts as "Perfect" is another simple love ballad. With how successful "Thinking Out Loud" was, it makes sense for Ed to have several of these on his album as he's pretty good at them. Now if that's all Ed were to do on his album is write love ballads, that would make a boring album as a whole, but individually these songs are pretty good. I wouldn't grade "Perfect" quite as high as "How Do I Feel," but it's a nice little song that means you can have plenty of Ed at your wedding reception if you want.

49- "Dive" - Ed Sheeran -- Another song that could be classified as ballad, although this one probably isn't as appropriate for a wedding reception. "How Do I Feel" and "Perfect" are both basic love songs that are really sweet and romantic. "Dive" is a slower song that has Ed trying to figure out this girl. It's obvious he likes her, but he sees her as very unique and mysterious. And he wants to learn more of who she is before he dives in. Specifically, he is asking for her to declare her intentions and feelings towards him before he makes a decision on what to do. It's a fine song, but it feels more like album filler that comes right in between "Castle on the Hill" and "Shape of You" on the album.

53- "Galway Girl" - Ed Sheeran -- If you find Ed Sheeran's love ballads too slow and boring for you and prefer things closer to that of what he's given us with "Galway Girl," then this might be your jam. Personally I'm a sucker for a good ballad and I've talked about two great ones on his album already, but that's just me. "Galway Girl" is an upbeat Irish folk song combined with Ed Sheeran's typical pop signature and it's a lot of fun. Comparing this to "Shape of You," this is slightly less catchy than "Shape of You," but slightly more wholesome than "Shape of You" as there's less blatancy with Ed lusting after this girl's body and more of him just having a great night with her at the bar or wherever they're at. We have an Irish folk band called Beoga helping out with all of the folky stuff which adds a lot of spice and groove to it.

59- "Happier" - Ed Sheeran -- Coming after "Galway Girl" both on the album and on the Billboard charts right now is "Happier," which is another ballad. This time being a bittersweet ballad for Ed as he learns the girl he just broke up with is with another man and looks happy with him. Ed is trying to be happy for her, but still has feelings for her, thus making it a hard situation for him. It also makes it a fairly relatable song as I'm sure we've all had situations where we broke up with someone and then had to painfully watch as they hook up with someone else. Possibly more album filler and nothing too amazing or unique for Ed, but it's fine.

72- "New Man" - Ed Sheeran -- There's a few times on this album where Ed does a little bit of rapping. Nothing crazy or extreme like actual rap songs on the charts, but he's going for a different sound instead of just another pop song or ballad and I respect the attempted change. He actually does a bit of rapping on "Galway Girl," but that crosses more into folk and fits the tone of the song. For me, "New Man" is the song that doesn't really have much of a catchy groove at all and doesn't really say anything interesting. It's similar to "Happier" as both songs are about his ex-girlfriend being with a new man, but "New Man" seems less earnest and bittersweet and more angry and stuck-up. It's one of the songs on the album that's kinda worth skipping. 

75- "Supermarket Flowers" - Ed Sheeran -- We now jump to the last song on the album if you didn't buy the deluxe version. Track No. 12. And this is a really beautiful song to end on. While most of the album are safe love songs, some of which work really well, this branches away from that and instead is a beautiful tribute to Ed's late grandmother, I believer. While "How Do I Feel" and "Perfect" can be played at wedding receptions and "Shape of You" and "Galway Girl" can be played at dance parties, "Supermarket Flowers" would be a song fitting for a funeral. Ed starts the song being broken up about the loss of this individual before being consoled and when we get to the chorus we have the beautiful line, "Spread your wings as you go; when God takes you back he'll say, 'Hallelujah, you're home.'" I love it. Arguably the second best song on the album behind "Castle on the Hill."

83- "What Do I Know?" - Ed Sheeran -- Backing up a little bit to track No. 10, we have the song with a message for the world. This isn't about romance or death or breakups. This is song more about politics, but doesn't dive super deep. Ed isn't taking a stance on one specific issue, but realizes that there's a lot of commotion going on in the world and is doing his best to ask for peace and unity. He admits that he doesn't know exactly what to do or say, as inferred by the title of the song, but he wants to do something and he's using his stage of being a music star to do something. This is not an upbeat song to dance to at a party or a slow ballad good for a wedding. Thus I don't ever imagine this being a single, but it's a really nice song with something good to say about the world that I'm sure Ed will use during his concerts to provide a nice change of pace and provide his attentive audience with something to think about.

90- "Eraser" - Ed Sheeran -- Now we back up even more and cover the song that starts the album off. It's not the best song, but it's a pretty good introduction to the album. This is one of the songs that Ed dives into a bit of poppy rap in his verses, but he seems to be telling a bit of a story about his life and his upbringing, which is why it makes for a good introduction to the album as we learn more about Ed and his experiences before diving into the specifics with the individual songs that follow. It's not a song that I will remember as time goes on, but it's a decent song.

93- "Hearts Don't Break Around Here" - Ed Sheeran -- Filling things out with the regular album before we dive into the one deluxe song that showed up on the charts is "Hearts Don't Break Around Here." This falls in at No. 9 right after "Happier" and "New Man" and right before "What Do I Know?" Admittedly this is the portion of the album that loses me a bit. We end the album on a great run with "What Do I Know?," "How Would You Feel" and "Supermarket Flowers," but "Happier," "New Man" and "Hearts Don't Break Around Here" are the low part of the album. This is again a slower song, but a slower song that in this case isn't super romantic, but more just slow and kinda boring. Ed had good ideas of how to start and end the album, but this fills like filler in order to make the album complete. I'll take a pass. But now that I've dove into all 12 of the songs from Ed Sheeran's album, I've looked at everything closely and overall I would give the album a B grade.

96- "Barcelona" - Ed Sheeran -- "Barcelona" is one of four bonus songs to come with the deluxe version of the album. The other three are "Bibia Be Ye Ye," "Nancy Mulligan" and "Save Myself." The latter three didn't show up on the charts. Only "Barcelona." I can tell why this was included as a bonus song and not on the regular album, but it's a fun dance song with a nice groove. It has no real depth or emotion to it. Ed is saying that they should pretend they are on the streets of Barcelona dancing, which sounds like a great place to be. This is certainly not a bad song. As I said, it's a fun song that works best as a good bonus song.

Thursday, March 9, 2017

DrogeMiester's Billboard Analysis - March 18, 2017

The new Billboard charts have arrived and so it's time again for me to give you my thoughts! In this weekly post, I cover three sections. First, I give my thoughts on the top 10 of the Billboard Hot 100. Second, I give my thoughts on the songs that experienced significant gains below the top 10. Third, I give my initial thoughts on our new arrivals this week. I may decide to switch things up in the future, but for now this is what I'm sticking with. I've followed the Billboard charts for a long time now and this is a great way for me to express my thoughts to the world. I hope you enjoy!

Billboard Hot 100 Top 10:

1- "Shape of You" - Ed Sheeran (=) -- It's week No. 6 for Ed Sheeran at No. 1. And as if Ed needed even more of a boost to keep his lead even bigger, his new album has officially been released. I gave it a listen and enjoyed it. I didn't find myself madly in love with the album, but I thought it was good and it has a good selection of solid songs for Ed and his team to pick as future singles. We'll see which songs show up next week on the charts off the album's debut and which songs eventually get chosen as singles.

2- "Bad and Boujee" - Migos featuring Lil Uzi Vert (=) -- There's been movement outside out top four and a wide range of new songs on the charts within the last month or so, but this top four is now stuck. I would like something to break it up. I'm especially waiting for this song to finally fall. That would be nice.

3- "I Don't Wanna Live Forever (Fifty Shades Darker)" - Zayn & Taylor Swift (=) -- It's only been a few weeks, but I'm already getting bored of this song being here. "Fifty Shades Darker" is now gone, so let's send its song away as well.

4- "That's What I Like" - Bruno Mars (=) -- I'm waiting for this song to break up our top three, but right now it's staying put at No. 4. It's having a pretty good week of sales right now, though, so it could jump up to No. 2 or No. 3 next week. Not that I really want it to do that, but it's not any worse than the current two songs right ahead of it, so it's whatever.

5- "Something Just Like This" - The Chainsmokers & Coldplay (+51) -- Ha! You thought "Paris" was going to be the song to replace "Closer" in the top five, did you? Here's a big surprise as this jumps 51 spots to become The Chainsmokers' next top five hit. I'm certainly happy. This is a great song by The Chainsmokers! Although I don't think it's staying in the top five next week as its sales are dropping quite a bit after a huge second week of sales. But it would be nice if this could eventually stabilize and do well on the charts.

6- "Love on the Brain" - Rihanna (+1) -- Despite still no music video or real push, Rihanna slowly climbs up the top 10, close to being Rihanna's next top five hit. And I think it has a great chance of doing so next week. Now if Rihanna's team is smart, they'll take advantage of this and start promoting the song.

7- "Paris" - The Chainsmokers (-1) -- This seems like the more stable Chainsmokers song right now, so I think it'll hang around for a while in the top 10. But with this, "Something Just Like This" and "Closer" all in the top 10, reports that The Chainsmokers are only the third group or duo to have three consecutive top 10 hits in the same week, the other two being The Beatles and The Bee Gees. Although that becomes a little less impressive when you realize that a large handful of solo artists have also accomplished this, so it's not that unique. But still impressive.

8- "Tunnel Vision" - Kodak Black (+19) -- This surprised me most this week. It debuted at No. 27 last week, so I was prepared for it to eventually hit top 10 if it caught on, but I wasn't expecting it to go top 10 in its second week on the charts. Out of all the rap songs to hit the charts lately, this is better than most and it's the best of Kodak Black's three songs to hit the charts this year, but I would still prefer if its stay in the top 10 was more of a brief stay than a permanent one, if you know what I mean.

9- "Bounce Back" - Big Sean (=) -- No bouncing back for Big Sean this week. Just stubbornly sticking around in the bottom of the top 10. It seems like its gained a bit of consistency, so I could see it hanging around for a bit. But I don't think it gets too much higher if it does stick around.

10- "Closer" - The Chainsmokers featuring Halsey (-5) -- Is "Closer" finally done? It looks like it's all-time record of weeks in the top five finishes with 27 weeks. It's now at 31 weeks in the top 10, which is one away from LeAnn Rimes' record of 32 weeks that she set with "How Do I Live" in the late 90's. All records were meant to be broken, especially with songs staying in the top 10 for longer these days, but it appears that LeAnn Rimes just might live to see another day with her record. Unless "Closer" can impress us again by staying in the top 10 for one more week. It would tie the record if it does so.

Rising on the Hot 100:

13- "Can't Stop the Feeling!" - Justin Timberlake (+16) -- Fresh off his performance at the Oscars after being nominated for best original song, an honor that I don't think this song really deserved, JT takes one final leap with this song, almost sending it back into the top 10. It's been a really impressive run on the charts after debuting on top several months ago. But now it will be be laid to rest soon.

14- "iSpy" - KYLE featuring Lil Yachty (+6) -- "iSpy" got stuck for a while on the charts and I was beginning to hope that it wouldn't go top 10 after all. There's still a chance it gets stuck right under, but now it looks like it is close to finally showing up. But let's hope it doesn't.

20- "Body Like a Back Road" - Sam Hunt (+2) -- How and why did this song wind up in the top 20? I don't understand at all.

27- "Issues" - Julia Michaels (+6) -- Julia Michaels has now broke top 30 with "Issues." It's a song that has been catching on with the radio based on my casual observations, so its future prospects are good. I hope it can go top 20 next!

58- "Everyday" - Ariana Grande featuring Future (+20) -- No! Go away! The world doesn't need anymore future and Ariana needs to be encouraged to write good songs without horrible rappers attached to it.

72- "Cash Me Outside (#CashMeOutside)" - DJ Suede the Remix God (+24) -- I learned where this song came from. An annoying 13-year-old girl came on Dr. Phil and said some really stupid things that made no sense. Then someone took those audio bites and remixed it into a song. And now its catching on. Ummm... guys? We've hit a new on the Billboard charts if things like this go viral. For the sake of my sanity, as well as the rest of the world's, let's hope this dies fast.

80- "How Far I'll Go" - Alessia Cara (+14) -- Auli'i Cravalho's performance of this song at the Oscars, which was phenomenal by the way, caused it to re-enter in the 50's and sent the forgettable pop version by Alessia up 14 spots. I don't cover re-entries, so this is where I talk about both versions as Alessia's version ended up lasting longer on the charts. As a reminder, I thought "Moana" was just OK and I thought this song was trying to hard to be the next "Let it Go," so I was never a huge fan. I especially didn't care for the pop version by Alessia. But I absolutely love Auli'i. I think she's adorable and talented and I wish her a long, successful career in either acting, singing or whatever she wants to do and I thought she killed it at the Oscars. So I'm happy for the re-entry even though I don't care for the Alessia version that we're actually talking about right now. It's been an impressive run for the "Moana" soundtrack.

New Arrivals:

28- "Stay" - Zedd & Alessia Cara -- I saw that Zedd and Alessia Cara had a collaboration and I was immediately in love. I think Alessia is a great pop singer and DJ Snake is one of my favorite DJ's. It seemed like a match made in heaven. Then I listened to the song. Honestly I'm disappointed. The lyrics are fairly run of the mill. They're in a relationship that just ended and Alessia is begging the guy to stay because she doesn't want to be alone. That's it. But OK. Sometimes EDM songs can have basic lyrics and still be a lot of fun. In fact, sometimes they don't even need lyrics. But Zedd's part of the song is completely empty and lifeless. There's not much of a drop and the chorus seems like it's purposely choppy, but it doesn't work for me. This may be the laziest effort that I've heard from Zedd.

34- "Slide" - Calvin Harris featuring Frank Ocean & Migos -- On the flip side of things, when I saw Calvin Harris was collaborating with Frank Ocean and Migos, I prepared for disaster. Not that I have a problem with Frank Ocean, but Calvin Harris is usually good at bringing us generic EDM and pairing him with Migos scared me. Surprisingly, though, I kinda dig this song. Funny how that worked out this week. I'm not quite sure what the song is getting at lyrically outside Frank Ocean saying he might go buy a Picasso painting that sold for a whole heck of a ton of money, giving me the idea that they might be talking about wanting to live above their means, wondering how that would be like. Nothing special there. But Frank Ocean begins this song and ends the song and his part is fairly smooth and relaxing. Quavo and Offset from Migos come in for the middle section and I was bracing for their typical annoying banter and I didn't really get it. They actually rapped without being weird and annoying. Their rap wasn't that great when I listened to and read the lyrics, but it wasn't bad. It was a good change of pace from Frank Ocean. Calvin Harris doesn't add any drops in the song. It's not your typical Calvin Harris dance song. But it's kind of a tropical house song that works a lot better than I thought it would. Not bad. 

37- "Selfish" - Future featuring Rihanna -- On last week's analysis, I mentioned that Future decided to release two albums within a week, which seemed like a weird choice. So last week I covered the first album. This week I cover the second album. Which is the album that actually includes featured artists, which the first album didn't have. Surprisingly, though, we only have two Future songs, which made me happy. I was bracing for five or six. And out of the two songs, "Selfish" isn't as bad as Future usually. We start and end with Rihanna and Future singing together before getting solo Future in the middle. And if you completely ignore the lyrics, the stuff with Rihanna isn't that bad. It's a decent ballad that I can get behind. The problem comes when you do look at the lyrics. They don't want to be alone, so they decide they're going to selfishly sleep together that night. The problem there is that relationships should be purely selfish. They should be unselfish. That's how they last. The song did need a rap verse in the middle or it would be completely void of substance. The problem is the rap verse is pretty awful. So no this is not good, but based on Future standards, there's been a lot worse.

48- "Comin Out Strong" - Future featuring The Weeknd -- And our second Future song does dip down to normal Future standards. I still think I prefer this over much of the stuff that came out last week, but that's not saying much. I actually liked a bit of what The Weeknd released on his recent album, but this outing for him goes back to the stuff from him that I don't care for. His chorus is boring and his verses have no interesting substance. When Future jumps in, he goes back to his mumbling things that I mostly don't understand. What I do pick up is pretty tasteless as usual. And with that I'm glad that I'm now done with Future for this week.

78- "Make Love" - Gucci Mane & Nicki Minaj -- After covering two Future songs, we unfortunately have to deal with something worse. If you thought Gucci Mane and Nicki Minaj rapping a song called "Make Love" sounded like it was going to be awful, you were right. Gucci Mane is just rapping about how he wants to make money and make love. Then Nicki comes in and is her annoying, dirty self and turns the song from bad to worse. And unfortunately she keeps going and going with a super long verse that is beyond awful. Nothing redeemable here. It's as awful as it seems like it would be.

89- "Losin Control" - Russ -- Now we get a song that was released a year ago. February 2016. I don't know who Russ is or why this song is charting right now, so long after his release. The only other song that Russ has charted is one called "What They Want," which isn't very good. This song, though, is less rap and more R&B. It's a slow, smooth song where Russ is apologizing to his ex-girlfriend. She's trying to start a new relationship, but is struggling because her experience with him was so bad. He treated her poorly and didn't respect her. And now he feels bad because this new guy loves her and is trying his best, but Russ may have ruined it for him. This song is simple, but it has a lot of emotion and honesty to it that I wasn't expecting. I kinda like it.

92- "God, Your Mama, and Me" - Florida Georgia Line featuring Backstreet Boys -- Yeah you read that right. Florida Georgia Line featuring Backstreet Boys. A collaboration you probably never thought you were going to get. Backstreet Boys haven't charted in the US since 2007 and haven't hit the top 20 since 2005. I don't know if this song is going to change the latter streak. It has a long way to go from No. 92. But this is a collaboration that surprisingly works. Florida Georgia Line is a country duo that I don't mind, partially because they are kind of a country pop duo, which is why a collaboration with an old boy band works as well as it does. The lyrics are basic country. He's telling the girl that no one is going to love her more than God, her mama and him. The music is basic Florida Georgia Line. But then Nick Carter and AJ McLean come and provide some interesting balance to the song. And, I don't know, it's kinda fun having the Backstreet Boys back on the charts.

96- "Hometown Girl" - Josh Turner -- "Hometown Girl" is from Josh Turner, a country singer I don't know much about, from his album called "Deep South," an album that I've not listened to. But I listened to this song in preparation for this and it's exactly what it sounds like when you see a country song called "Hometown Girl" from an album called "Deep South." Josh Turner has a very deep southern voice and he's singing about wanting to find a hometown girl like her. She left off to New York, but she couldn't even hide her beauty when she was wearing a baseball cap. Basic country, but not boring or bad country. Sounds like something they would enjoy in the deep south.

100- "Green Light" - Lorde -- For the longest time now I have been wondering where in the heck Lorde disappeared to. The 16-year-old New Zealand girl named Ella Marija Lani Yelich-O'Conner -- better known by Lorde for reasons that you can imagine -- released her debut album "Pure Heroine" (heroine as in the female hero, not the drug -- the drug is spelled with no "e") shortly before turning 17. This included songs such as "Royals," "Tennis Court" and "Team," which I really grew to love. In fact, I love that whole album. She brought a unique voice and style to the table that I really appreciated. I've been waiting for a follow-up album for a long time now and wondering when it would come. Well, now Lorde is 20 years old, turning 21 later in the year, and the album is finally arriving. And the lead-off single is "Green Light," which dropped without me even knowing it was coming. And I really enjoy it. The song starts slow and simple, with the typical Lorde style. But then she starts to add a lot of personality and when we get to the chorus the tempo picks up and we transition into a solid pop song. It's good to finally have Lorde back and I look forward to her upcoming album. This made it to No. 100 with only a day or two of sales, so look for it to take a big jump next week.

Wednesday, March 1, 2017

DrogeMiester's Billboard Analysis - March 11, 2017

The new Billboard charts have arrived and so it's time again for me to give you my thoughts! In this weekly post, I cover three sections. First, I give my thoughts on the top 10 of the Billboard Hot 100. Second, I give my thoughts on the songs that experienced significant gains below the top 10. Third, I give my initial thoughts on our new arrivals this week. I may decide to switch things up in the future, but for now this is what I'm sticking with. I've followed the Billboard charts for a long time now and this is a great way for me to express my thoughts to the world. I hope you enjoy!

Billboard Hot 100 Top 10:

1- "Shape of You" - Ed Sheeran (=) -- Five weeks at No. 1 for Ed and his reign isn't coming to an end any time soon. We don't have any super strong contenders to take over in the next month or so. Plus, his new album "÷" (I got super fancy with that one -- had to go to the character map for that symbol) is due Friday, which should give him yet another boost in addition to the plenty of boosts that he's already had.

2- "Bad and Boujee" - Migos featuring Lil Uzi Vert (+1) -- This continues to be a streaming monster, which is why it retakes the No. 2 spot. It's declining in streaming, but not very fast. And for some reason this is gaining a bit a radio. I have no idea why. This better not play on any radio station I'm listening to.

3- "I Don't Wanna Live Forever (Fifty Shades Darker)" - Zayn & Taylor Swift (-1) -- As I foresaw last week, the huge drop in sales this week following it's boost after the movie and album release, sends this back down to No. 3. I have a feeling this is where it stays. If anything, it might go down because Bruno's new song continues to gain good momentum.

4- "That's What I Like" - Bruno Mars (+3) -- I think this jumped up to No. 4 due to the weakness of other songs that were above it as the Grammy boost has worn off and, even though this also dropped in sales, it didn't drop nearly as much as other songs. Plus this is getting a lot of momentum on radio and streaming in addition to its fairly consistent sales. It has a while to go before it jumps ahead of the three songs ahead of it, but once Ed starts to slow down a bit, this could conceivably be our next No. 1 hit.

5- "Closer" - The Chainsmokers featuring Halsey (=) -- What in the heck? Even I'm shocked this week that this STAYED in the top five. It got a Grammy's boost last week, but I thought that it would at least drop down to No. 7 or so after that boost went away, especially since "Paris" is getting a good push AND they have a new collaboration with Coldplay that I'll talk about in the new arrivals section. You would think that this would be done by now. But nope, the juggernaut continues to dominate. It's now extended it's record run in the top five to 27 weeks and has now tied "Uptown Funk" for the second longest stay in the top 10 with 30 weeks. And remember, this debuted in the top 10, which means it easily has the record of longest stay in the top 10 for a song that debuted in the top 10. It's only two weeks away from tying LeAnn Rimes' 32-week record of the longest stay in the top 10 that she set with "How Do I Live." I'm beginning to think that record is in trouble.

6- "Paris" - The Chainsmokers (+5) -- And The Chainsmokers go back to back in the top 10 with the return of "Paris," which I was anticipating would happen after everyone's Grammy boost went away. Despite my dislike of this song, The Chainsmokers released a remix EP of the song (a common occurrence in the EDM world). All of the remixes are significantly better. They may not change Taggart's weak vocals or the lackluster lyrics, but they transform the beat into something that the song should've been in the first place. Specifically you should check out the LOUDPVCK remix, the FKYA remix and the VINAI remix. I really enjoy all three of those.

7- "Love on the Brain" - Rihanna (+1) -- Rihanna still doesn't have a music video for this. Not even a lyric video. It almost seems like she's not even trying to promote it, but lucky for her the radio is absolutely eating this up, so she might not have to. Although if she does release a music video and push this hard, this could be her next No. 1 hit. Not that I think she needs another No. 1 hit, but I'm just saying.

8- "Chained to the Rhythm" - Katy Perry (-4) -- I always see comments on the internet from people claiming a song has flopped when it debuts high then falls in its second week. I always laugh at these comments because they obviously don't follow the charts super close. Every song that has a bid debut falls hard in sales in their second week. The fact that Katy stayed in the top 10 in week two is a good sign. This is a solid hold. This is getting a lot of good radio traction, so it might be here to stay. Although the next few weeks will tell us the real story here, so stay tuned.

9- "Bounce Back" - Big Sean (+1) -- And Big Sean bounces back. Up to No. 9. With not a lot of movement just below the top 10, this might hang around for a bit in the bottom half of the top 10. 

10- "Bad Things" - Machine Gun Kelly & Camila Cabello (-4) -- Ouch. This song went the opposite direction of what I was expected. It held well against the huge Grammy push, but ended up falling down with them instead of staying consistent. Minor surprise there, but I'm not super upset.

Rising on the Hot 100:

12- "It Ain't Me" - Kygo & Selena Gomez (+71) -- Oh hey there Kygo! I knew this was going to get a huge boost this week because it debuted at No. 93 after only a few days. I didn't expect it to jump all the way up to No. 12 it its first full week, though. Very impressive! It's going to take a huge fall next week in its second full week. See my comment just above with Katy's song. Second week falls happen. But I really hope this hangs around and becomes a hit.

22- "Body Like a Back Road" - Sam Hunt (+5) -- Why in the fetch are people listening to this song? The fact that it debuted super high is bad enough. But gaining traction and now flirting with the top 20? Ouch! That hurts! I hope this is where the song peaks. It's a horrible song. Comparing a girl's body to a back road gets more awkward and wrong the more you think about it.

23- "Cold" - Maroon 5 featuring Future (+19) -- This is going to be a hit, isn't it? Another top 10 entry for Maroon 5 that no one will remember even existed in a year from now. But thanks to the radio's love affair with Maroon 5, we have to suffer through constant mediocrity. And the worst part of it is Maroon 5 is taking Future with him.

25- "Down" - Marian Hill (+5) -- We're close to the top 20 here! Let's keep it going!


68- "Rolex" - Ayo & Teo (+19) -- We're going to let this into the top 50 as well, aren't we? Why? Just, why?

82- "Hurricane" - Luke Combs (+14) -- The good country songs never survive. It's the boring mediocrity that country radio clings onto. Because, you know, we can't have any good country songs get popular, can we?

New Arrivals:

27- "Tunnel Vision" - Kodak Black -- A third Hot 100 entry for Kodak Black this year and second in two weeks. This one debuts at No. 27, which means the world is going to make Kodak Black a thing in 2017. I'm not sure how I feel about this. His other two songs, "No Flockin" and "Everything 1K" were pretty bad. This song starts out promising. It has a really catchy intro leading into Kodak's rap. But then he starts the song with a squeak. Because Migos is starting an awful trend of annoying sounds in rap music. Quite honestly, though, this is easily the best of the three Kodak Black songs. I was digging the chorus. It's fairly decent. But then the verses hit and they throw the song in the blender with some pretty awful rap. Overall, not bad. But not great either as it's way too uneven.

41- "How Would You Feel (Paean)" - Ed Sheeran -- Ed's new album "÷" is coming this week and heading into that, we have a third song released to help promote the album. Ed mentioned on twitter that this isn't the next single, but it's one of his favorite songs from the album. For me, this is a very positive sign for his upcoming album that gets me excited. I love "Castle on the Hill" and I think "Shape of You" is a fun song. Apparently a paean is a song or lyric poem that expresses triumph or thanksgiving. In case you were curious. Here we have a very pretty love song that reminds me of "Thinking Out Loud." Except better. It's simple, yet beautiful, and would make for a perfect wedding song.

44- "Love" - Lana Del Rey -- Speaking of love, we have the return of Lana Del Rey with the song that I believe is the lead-off single for her fifth studio album. Her album "Honeymoon" I thought was pretty good, but it didn't produce any hits. Let's hope this next album gives her at least a hit or two. And I would love one of them to be "Love." True to Lana's style, this is a bit of a haunting love song. In sound anyways. That depressing, haunting sound that Lana brings to her music is why I love her. I'm not exactly sure what point Lana is trying to get across in this song. Some sort of social commentary on young love and how often that is all that matters. It's not really a wedding song like Ed's song right above, but I really enjoy it. It's a song that I'm sure will grow on me as time moves on.

46- "Draco" - Future -- I don't know why, but for some reason Future decided to release two albums within a week of each other. A self-titled album called "FUTURE" on February 17 and an album called "HNDRXX" on February 24. This week I get to cover the songs from "FUTURE" and next week I'm sure I'll have plenty to cover from "HNDRXX." Joy! The reason I don't like Future is because he's popularized what I call mumble rap. He kinda lazily mumbles his way through all of his music and for some reason we call that good music today that too many have copied. The big song this week is "Draco." Not as in Malfoy, but apparently Draco is a Romanian shortened AK-47 assault rifle. The song has an interesting electronic noise of some sort going on in the background which caught my attention, but outside that there's no flow to this song. Every line in every verse is the same length and same flow, so it gets boring after 20 seconds, but continues for like four minutes. I don't think the lyrics are gross or offensive, but I don't understand what he's talking about. It all feels very random and lazy. Like he quickly threw together two albums without putting much effort into it.

49- "Mask Off" - Future -- I don't know why Future is trying to copy Migos, but this is a really annoying trend that I'm starting to see happen. As a reminder, all of Migos' songs consist of a whole bunch of short stanzas usually from three to five words each, sometimes shorter, with a lot of echoing and a lot of weird noises. That's what this song is, but without the weird noises. Future says a couple of words, then there's an echo. This pattern continues the whole song. Thankfully Future does Migos in a much less annoying way, but he's still doing Migos, which annoys me.

52- "Heavy" - Linkin Park & Kiiara -- When I saw that I had new Linkin Park to cover this week, I was stoked. With much of the charts so bad, the world could use more Linkin Park. Honestly Linkin Park has been one of my favorite rock bands for a long time. Ever since their debut album in 2000, "Hybrid Theory," I've been all in. Through their six albums, they've managed to stay relevant by experimenting with new sounds and genres, while still keeping their core sound. So a lead-off single for a seventh studio album sounds perfect. But then I listened to the song. And quite frankly, this does not sound like Linkin Park. And I'll turn to some YouTube comments on their lyric video that express how I feel: "I can't piss off my neighbors with this..." "Ummm waiter, you forgot to put the Linkin Park in my Linkin Park." "Hopefully this is the best prank of 2017." "With this music, Goku will never beat Freiza." "You were supposed to destroy the Sith, not join them!" If I pretend this isn't Linkin Park, then this is a decent pop song with a nice balance between the male and female singer. The lyrics are pretty decent. But I can't avoid this giant elephant in the room. This does not sound like Linkin Park and I don't even think this counts as rock. Thus my big word here is disappointing. I hope the rest of the album isn't like this.

54- "Rent Money" - Future -- With "Rent Money," Future is back to being Future instead of trying to be Migos. I don't know if that's really a good thing, but at least he's being himself instead of trying to cash in on the annoying Migos success. This is also a song where I'm not bored 20 seconds in like I am with "Draco." There's also more of a flow on this song instead of Future just repeating the same over and over. He hits different notes and has different flows throughout the song, so I feel a little more creativity with this song. And when I read the lyrics, I can actually understand somewhat of a story being told instead of it being a bunch of random lyrics that make no sense. There's also some sort of choir chanting four different notes on repeat in the background. But don't think I'm going to praise this song too much. I'm just pointing out things that seem like Future actually put a bit of effort into. But those lyrics I can understand this time around are quite unpleasant to say the least. Something to the effect of him selling drugs to pay the rent and sleeping with other people's girls. So no, definitely not giving this a pass.

56- "Something Just Like This" - The Chainsmokers & Coldplay -- The big problem with all of The Chainsmokers' songs since "Closer," exemplified with the atrocity that is the original version of "Paris": Andrew Taggart's vocals aren't good, the lyrics are lazy and there is no beat. When I analyzed "Paris," I begged them to go back to what made them a great EDM duo before they became superstars. Well, they listened. First fix: Chris Martin of Coldplay. After "Closer" and "Paris," it's nice to have a male voice in there comes from a good, trained musician. Second fix: good lyrics. The lyrics didn't hit me at first. I was thinking it was just your basic EDM lyrics, but then I thought about them and I decided I really love them. Chris is feeling bad because he's thinking of all these superheros and legends and realizes that he's not one of them, so he thinks the girl won't want him because he doesn't think he's good enough. But then without having the girl come in and sing a duet, he then tells us that she said she doesn't want some legend or superhero. She wants a normal person like him, which obviously boosts his confidence. How often to we think we aren't good enough for someone, but we are just being too hard on ourselves? Third fix: the beat. The drop is exactly like "Roses" and everyone is pointing it out. But hey, "Roses" is their best song. They've been spending their last several songs copying "Closer," so if they have to copy one of their songs, how about they copy their best thing. Yes, I like this. I like this a lot! The Chainsmokers' first full length album comes out in April and I hope it has more like this.

91- "Super Trapper" - Future -- To finish things off, we have the two Future tracks that barely snuck onto the Hot 100. The first of these two being "Super Trapper." Whereas in "Rent Money" I felt Future at least tried to do something interesting, despite the words lyrics being awful, this song does nothing interesting. In fact, it's kind of a mix of "Draco" and "Mask Off." The flow is boring and repetitive and he's echoing himself throughout the whole song. He's claiming throughout the song that he's a super trapper. I don't know what that means, but I don't really care to really figure that out. This song is just flat out dull.

99- "Zoom" - Future -- Last and certainly least we have the Future song that is all out Migos, sound effects and all. The other songs I rolled my eyes at as I was annoyed with the short phrases and the echoing. Here he has the short phrases, the echoing AND the annoying sound effects throughout, which is the complete trademark of Migos. And for the most part, the lyrics don't even make any sense at all. The funny thing about this is that there is a part of this song where he disses Desiigner and other rappers for copying him while bragging that they are not on his level. Which is really hypocritical because Future in this is copying Migos while doing so and does a pretty cruddy job at it. And, oh yeah, Desiigner is a lot better than Future. Not great by any means, but a lot more tolerable than Future. And he even took his own song to the No. 1 spot on the Billboard charts. So yeah, a fail on all levels for Future. Easily the worst of the five Future songs I have covered this week.