Billboard Hot 100 Top 10:
1- "rockstar" - Post Malone featuring 21 Savage (=) -- The Billboard year for 2017 has finished as Billboard counts their year from December through November so that they can get their best of lists out in early December. This has always been a weird thing to me. I guess they think they'll get more views before Christmas as opposed to right after Christmas. But whatever. That's not how I roll. In my books, 2017 still has a month left, meaning we have to suffer through this "rockstar" crap for a few more weeks this year, whereas I thought we were going to end the year with "Havana" being No. 1. Both songs started their 69 cent iTunes discount, which makes sense as to why sales for both jumped up. But where I'm confused is in the streaming. "rockstar" had been declining in streaming the last few weeks, but jumped up 13 percent this week to 49.2 million U.S. streams and I have no idea why. "Havana," while being ahead on sales and radio yet again, with margins increasing there, is only at 33.4 million U.S. streams, which is only a 1 percent increase from last week. Thus I have no idea how long "rockstar" will be ahead of "Havana" as the streaming of "rockstar" will need to plummet for "Havana" to go No. 1 and apparently it's going to be really stubborn on that front, which is frustrating to me because this song belongs nowhere near this spot.
2- "Havana" - Camila Cabello featuring Young Thug (=) -- If "Havana" ends up being another song that gets stuck at the runner-up spot for its peak, I'm going to be really upset. Not necessarily because I'm madly in love with the song, but it is miles better that the song ahead of it and light years better than the song that's now right behind it. I just want a decent song at the top instead of this crap that some people in this country consider good music. "Havana" is a decent song from a decent pop singer. "rockstar" and "Gucci Gang" are both complete crap. I don't understand.
3- "Gucci Gang" - Lil Pump (+9) -- Just when I thought the Billboard charts in 2017 couldn't get any worse with "rockstar" leading for six weeks now, I feel like I just got another punch in the face delivered when I wasn't expecting it. You saw my rant two weeks ago when this snuck into the top 10 and you probably noticed that I was excited last week when it fell back out. I was given a bit of hope there that it would be a one-week wonder in the top 10 and leave me alone. But No. 3? With a whole fetching truck-load of streaming? "Gucci Gang" jumped up 35 percent in streaming this week to 45 million U.S. streams, boosted by continual moment from the music video as well as a bunch of user-generated viral videos that Billboard really needs to ax from their streaming formula. Count the official video and let that be the end of it when it comes to YouTube. As is, it now appears that "Gucci Gang," not "Havana" is more likely to dethrone "rockstar" and that just makes me want to puke.
4- "Thunder" - Imagine Dragons (+1) -- Topping things off, "Thunder" jumped another spot and is now the top song on radio. This comes as no surprise, but Dan Reynolds and company must be super excited that this lazily put-together piece of crap has gained them so much success. This makes me upset because it probably teaches them that the key to success is to put as little effort into your songs as possible while the people who actually care about their music aren't give the time of day. This is not how this thing called music should work. We should reward people for effort and punish the lazy, not the other way around.
5- "Bodak Yellow (Money Moves)" - Cardi B (-2) -- The only positive note in this top five is that "Bodak Yellow" continues to lose steam. But heck, as dumb as this song is, I would actually prefer this over "rockstar," "Gucci Gang" and "Thunder."
6- "Too Good at Goodbyes" - Sam Smith (-2) -- It's also nice to see that Sam Smith didn't fall too far. He got a huge boost last week thanks to his album release, which made me think that the song would tumble this week, but it only falls two spots as radio holds it up. I hope that it can gain enough radio traction to at least stay in the top 10 for a while.
7- "Perfect" - Ed Sheeran (+1) -- While all seems dark and dreary, at least I have the hope that Ed Sheeran is here for me. If this song, which I still contend is a very sweet and romantic love ballad, continues to rise on the charts, at least that will give me something to hold onto.
8- "1-800-273-8255" - Logic featuring Alessia Cara & Khalid (-2) -- It's been a strong run for Logic in the top 10 and I really appreciate him for making a difference in the world with this song. And due to the fact that I follow the normal calendar year and not Billboard's strange December through November thing, if this song hangs onto a spot in the top 10 for just one more week, it will officially crack the top 10 most popular songs of 2017 according my system, passing Zayn and Taylor Swift's "I Don't Wanna Live Forever," from "Fifty Shades Darker," a song that I'm willing to bet all of you have forgotten by now, from a movie I'll also bet you forgot came out this year.
9- "Feel It Still" - Portugal. The Man (-2) -- After five weeks on top of the radio charts, "Feel It Still" has given the title over to "Thunder." With all the crap happening in 2017, I'm really glad that the radio accepted this song. And a random note from Billboard's weekly article, with Portugal. The Man passing the radio torch to Imagine Dragons, it's the first time in five years that two rock songs have led consecutively on the radio. The previous two were fun.'s "We Are Young" and Gotye's "Somebody That I Used to Know" in 2012. Because apparently those two count as rock songs?
10- "Mi Gente" - J Balvin & Willy William featuring Beyonce (=) -- Leading the caboose for the to 10 this week is yet again "Mi Gente." Probably because nothing else from the below the top 10 was rising fast enough to kick this out. "Gucci Gang" soaring back into the top 10 kicked out Maroon 5's "What Lovers Do" instead of "Mi Gente." Even though I shed no tears at yet another Maroon 5 song leaving the region, which I imagine will be back anyways, I would be totally willing to trade those two songs again.
Rising on the Hot 100:
15- "MotorSport" - Migos, Nicki Minaj & Cardi B (+8) -- Migos and their two lady rapper friends complete the successful yo-yo this week as this is around where they debuted two weeks ago before dropping into the 20's following the debut and going right back up this week. Now I would personally prefer of that yo-yo pattern continued next week because I don't want this song in the top 10. That fast we get rid of anything Migos related, the better. If we could just leave them and their horrifically awful style of rap in 2017, that would be greatly appreciated. Write it off as a musical mistake that led to an annoying trend of echoes and sound effects poisoning horribly written rap songs.
17- "Bad at Love" - Halsey (+3) -- I'm not convinced that Halsey is going to get much higher with this song. It seems like the type of thing that gets stuck in the teens. But if it does go higher, well, I suppose there's worse things that could happen. But there's two ladies right behind her that I would prefer to find success over Halsey.
18- "...Ready for It?" - Taylor Swift (+12) -- The album drop helped Taylor a bit this week as that's what I'm crediting the rise of her two singles. The big question moving forward will surround Taylor's ability to find any actual real traction with this album. Can "...Ready for It?" actually become a major hit? Or will it too start to fall down next week after the album boost fades away?
19- "New Rules" - Dua Lipa (+2) -- I just recently did an in depth look into Dua Lipa's self-titled album from earlier this year and if you haven't listened to it, I'd give it a solid recommendation. It's nothing special, but Dua Lipa is a talented female vocalist with some fun pop songs on the album. I'd give it a solid B grade. The best songs are "No Goodbyes," "Homesick," "Be the One" and "Garden." I don't know what Dua's plans are following "New Rules," but promoting either of those songs would be my personal vote. In the meantime, I hope that this can somehow sneak its way into the top 10, but I wouldn't be surprised if it also gets stuck in the teens.
31- "Look What You Made Me Do" - Taylor Swift (+6) -- After taking a huge tumble in all metrics following its massive debut, Taylor's album release helps this song recover a little bit. But I don't expect this to last at all. This just might be off the charts completely in a month or so. And speaking of that album, due to Taylor's decision to not put it up on any streaming platform for the time being, none of the songs from the album debuted this week, whereas in the past she's had almost all of her songs debut following her album release. That means I don't have to worry about me not having listened to the album yet. I'll check it out when Taylor decides to soften her heart and release it on streaming platforms. In the meantime I hope she's at peace with the fact that this decision of her's has resulted in a massive disappointment when it comes to the album's success. Waging a war on streaming in today's world, regardless of how valiant the cause is, will result in a loss on the part of the artist.
38- "The Weekend" - SZA (+5) -- I almost forgot this song existed. I'm sure that some are happy that this song is rising. But I've decided that SZA is an artist that I don't really care to have success. I'm open to her changing my mind in the future, though.
44- "Silence" - Marshmello featuring Khalid (+10) -- I wonder if this song is actually going to find success or if it will continue to just yo-yo around the middle of the charts. I'd like it to have success. It would be nice to have a bit more Marshmello in our lives.
45- "Greatest Love Story" - LANCO (+7) -- I also almost forgot this song existed. I had to go give it another listen. Oh yeah. This random country band singing a typical love ballad where the lead singer is talking about him and his girl having the potential to be the greatest love story the world has ever seen, wherein he leaves us on a cliffhanger as to whether or not she says yes to his marriage proposal. I suppose the fact that I forgot about this after two months tells the story here, but this isn't bad. I'm fine with this rising on the country charts.
70- "Dusk Till Dawn" - Zayn featuring Sia (+10) -- Did you know Sia released a Christmas album recently? It's full of original Christmas songs, too! That's cool. Do you know what I don't care about? This strange Sia/Zayn collaboration that should've never happened.
New Arrivals:
14- "Walk on Water" - Eminem featuring Beyonce -- First thing's first. Have you heard the Thirty Seconds to Mars song from this year also called "Walk on Water"? If you've watched ESPN at any point this year, chances are you have as that's their current song they use to advertise the college football game of the week. "Do you believe that you can walk on water? Do you believe that you can win this fight tonight?" Yeah? Familiar? A pretty good song, I'd say. Check it out if you haven't.
OK, onto Eminem's "Walk on Water." If this signals the upcoming arrival of Eminem's ninth studio album "Revival," which I believe this is the lead-off single, then I'm totally game for that. Eminem is a rapper that I can totally get behind as I believe he is one of the world's best lyricists. He always puts a lot of passion, fire and emotion into his rap. It means something to him. And the way he constructs his rap is poetic and beautiful when you dive into the lyrics. His last studio album, "The Marshall Mathers LP 2," was released all the way back in November 2013. He's shown up occasionally since then, but it's about time the world is graced with another album from the rap god.
So how is the song? I really like it. It reminds me a lot of "The Monster" from "The Marshall Mathers LP 2," which had Rihanna taking on the simple chorus that was spliced in between Eminem's verses. This time it's Beyonce balancing Eminem out. With Eminem often referred to as the rap god, it's interesting that the song starts out with Beyonce's chorus saying "I can walk on water," but then adding only when the water is frozen as "I ain't no Jesus." With that in mind, Eminem then chronicles his struggles with writing music over the course of his last few albums. He thinks he has something good on paper when he releases it, but then listens to it on the radio later and is able to pick it apart, which is a frustrating, exhaustive process for him. Add to that the fact that he's falling out if favor with critics and he talks about him losing confidence. People, especially kids, look to him as a god. But he's just a human who's having a rough time living up to the expectations he sets for himself. Is this next set going to be a revival of his career or is it another misstep? I think it's a fascinating look into the mind of a musician who's trying to maintain a successful career.
58- "Gummo" - 6ix9ine -- Well, there's a name that's annoying enough for to put me off right off the bat. But I suppose that's better than Teka$hi69, which is apparently the previous name that this 21-year-old rapper went by. He has 69 tattooed on his body over 200 times, which is says represents a lifestyle. A lifestyle that apparently involves him being a very angry, violent human being. At least according to this song. He's style of rap is yelling and in this song he's yelling about killing people as easily as popping a wheelie, robbing them, stealing their girls, sleeping with said girls then sending them away and lots of stuff like that. The song doesn't mention the word "Gummo" in it, but that's a movie about a bunch of kids living crazy, misbehaving, thrill-seeking lives. So, in other words, someone needs to get this guy in control before he ends up in prison. And I'm certainly against him having a successful career. But, you know, that's what we do in 2017. Give horrible thugs successful rapping careers.
65- "Wanted You" - NAV featuring Lil Uzi Vert -- Well at least we are onto a normal rap song this time. After being yelled at by 6ix9ine, who is bragging about committing all these horrible crimes, NAV and Lil Uzi are actually rapping like calm, normal humans. That was a slight breath of fresh air. But that didn't last too long as these two just bored me with this song. Nothing extremely offensive or horrible, but NAV was excited to be with and sleep with this girl only to find out that she's been sleeping around with someone else. So he spends the whole song moping and complaining about how disappointed he was in that and he has Lil Uzi complaining with him. Yawn.
69- "Female" - Keith Urban -- I won't lie, I saw this song title and was really nervous that this would be another generic country song from a generic country singer. But that's why we don't judge a book by its cover because this is a really good song with a really good message. This song was written three weeks prior to its release by Shane McAnally, Ross Cooperman and Nicolle Galyon as a response to Harvey Weinstein sexual assault allegations that have sparked a great movement, inspiring all sorts of people to speak out against sexual assault. This movement has been one of the great things about 2017 as we stand together to condemn these perpetrators. The three aforementioned people were sitting in a room thinking of what they could do to help. The decision was to write a song condemning sexism and pointing out how amazing females are in our life. Even though Keith Urban wasn't involved in the writing process, he was the man chosen to sing the song and he does a good job at it. It's a simple song, yet a beautiful one with a positive message.
93- "Betrayed" - Lil Xan -- It's hard to go from that song to another debut song from a SoundCloud rapper. And by debut song, I mean this is Lil Xan's first song on the Hot 100 after a music video for his "Betrayed" was posted on YouTube and went viral. On the positive note, Lil Xan claims this is a song that's anti-drugs, specifically saying how the drug Xanax ruined his life and now he's off of it. That's good in principle and the chorus is decent. But we have to get through all the mumbling and unintelligent lyrics in the verses first. Part of me really hates SoundCloud for providing a means for all of these horrible rappers to gain popularity. But I suppose I should instead blame America for eating their music up and making them popular. If you reading this are a part of this movement by helping all of these untalented rappers go viral, then shame on you.
96- "The Plan" - G-Eazy -- At least with Lil Xan's unintelligent lyrics, his motivations were to write an anti-drug song. We follow that up with a pro-drug song from G-Eazy. Well, not just a pro-drug song. His plan is to get all the drugs, money and girls he can. The money isn't going to make itself, right? Yeah, I don't want to deal with this. I'm just happy G-Eazy's song "No Limit" got stuck this week at No. 13 and didn't make the top 10. I wish his plan were to leave the music scene and leave us all alone. That would make the world a better place.
97- "Pick It Up" - Famous Dex featuring A$AP Rocky -- 6ix9ine. Lil Xan. Famous Dex. Three new horrible rappers debuting this week that I hope the world rejects. Famous Dex and A$AP Rocky are just rapping on this track about how rich and famous they are as well as how they love sleeping with all the girls. No creativity. No talent. No class. Just another worthless rap song worth throwing in the trash.
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