Wednesday, November 29, 2017

DrogeMiester's Billboard Analysis - December 9, 2017

The new Billboard charts have arrived and so it's time again for me to give you my thoughts! In this weekly post, I cover three sections. First, I give my thoughts on the top 10 of the Billboard Hot 100. Second, I give my thoughts on the songs that experienced significant gains below the top 10. Third, I give my initial thoughts on our new arrivals this week. I reserve the right to switch things up in the future, but for now this is what I'm sticking with. I've followed the Billboard charts for a long time now and this is a great way for me to express my thoughts to the world. I hope you enjoy!


Billboard Hot 100 Top 10:






1- "rockstar" - Post Malone featuring 21 Savage (=) -- What are we doing, America? Why in the name of everything that's good and right in the world did we give Post Malone seven weeks at No. 1? Can we get over ourselves, call this an extreme embarrassment that we let such a boring song delivered by such poor talent do this well and move on with life? Holding this song up, once again, is the monstrous streaming, which, after several weeks of declining, has now had a major increase for the second straight week as it jumps up 12 percent to 55.3 million U.S. streams. I'm not sure why it got the boost last week, but this week it's because Post Malone finally dropped the official video instead of just having that weird black snake/barbed wire official audio thing. Maybe that means next week it will drop in streaming and let "Havana" take a turn at the top because "Havana" is now owning "rockstar" on both sales and radio. And for your useless fact of the week courtesy of Gary Trust's weekly article on Billboard.com, "rockstar" has tied the record for most weeks at No. 1 for a song with the word "rock" somewhere in the title. The tie is with Joan Jett & the Blackhearts' "I Love Rock & Roll."

2- "Havana" - Camila Cabello featuring Young Thug (=) -- If you're curious about official numbers, "rockstar" leads the charts with 55.3 million U.S streams (up 12 percent), 58,000 sales (up 10 percent) and 86 million in radio audience (up 6 percent). "Havana" this week has 40.2 million U.S. streams (up 20 percent), 85,000 sales (up 14 percent) and 105 million in radio audience (up 20 percent). So yeah, it gained a lot of momentum this week and is only trailing in streaming. Perhaps Billboard needs to adjust their formula to not put so much emphasis on streaming, because that's where all the awful songs are coming from, anyways.

3- "Gucci Gang" - Lil Pump (=) -- This songs stays put this week at No. 3 instead of jumping higher like I feared it would. So we're going to call that a momentary win.

4- "Thunder" - Imagine Dragons (=) -- Imagine Dragons also stays put. In case you're a fan of this empty, lifeless song, don't get your hopes up that this is getting any higher, because, despite a lead on radio, streaming is M.I.A. compared to the top three, so this ain't going anywhere. I personally hope the radio drops it and causes it to fall.

5- "Perfect" - Ed Sheeran (+2) -- It's good to see Ed Sheeran in the top five because now we have another song that's actually worthy of this status. It was frustrating to only have "Havana" to cheer for in the top five last week. I'm not even madly in love with "Havana," but it's the only song that was even decent. Ed Sheeran gets a lot of hate from certain crowds, but come on. Wouldn't you rather have a pretty love ballad towards the top than all this disgusting rap music?

6- "Bodak Yellow (Money Moves)" - Cardi B (-1) -- We let Cardi B get 14 weeks in the top five. That was probably 14 weeks too long. But hey, I've warmed up on this song just a tiny bit for the sole reason that it's much better than "rockstar" and "Gucci Gang," even though that's not saying much. I'd be willing to give this song another few weeks if it meant getting rid of the other two. But the best situation would be to simply get rid of all three of them and replace them with good songs.

7- "Too Good at Goodbyes" - Sam Smith (-1) -- On the one hand, I'm glad that this has enough traction to not fall out of the top 10. But on the other, I wish it had more traction to actually make an impact in the top five. If this became our No. 1 hit I would be really happy because it's easily the best song in the top 10 right now

8- "Feel It Still" - Portugal. The Man (+1) -- We got rid of Logic this week as well as "Mi Gente," but we kept Portugal. The Man for another week! That made me happy. I don't know how much longer this has left, but I'll take as many weeks as I can get.

9- "Sorry Not Sorry" - Demi Lovato (+3) -- Welcome back to the top 10, Demi! I believe this got a boost because Demi performed this at the American Music Awards. In fact, that also helped "Feel It Still" and "Thunder" this week. So I imagine this will drop out again next week, but it was good to have it back.

10- "What Lovers Do" - Maroon 5 featuring SZA (+1) -- I'm not surprised to see this back. But I would prefer it if it didn't get much higher than this. At least stay in the bottom half of the top 10. That would be nice.


Rising on the Hot 100:





11- "No Limit" - G-Eazy featuring A$AP Rocky & Cardi B (+2) -- I dread the day that this sneaks into the top 10. Each new week I think that this will be the week. And it looks like next week will be the week. But wouldn't it be great if this instead got stuck at No. 11?

14- "Bad at Love" - Halsey (+3) -- Halsey also seems headed for the top 10. Although I don't envision this getting too high when it gets there.

15- "Bank Account" - 21 Savage (+12) -- This song keeps haunting me. Why won't it go away for good, already?

19- "Despacito" - Luis Fonsi & Daddy Yankee featuring Justin Bieber (+3) -- "Despacito" got nominated for both record of the year and song of the year. In record of the year, it's competing against "Redbone" by Childish Gambino, "The Story of O.J." by JAY-Z, "HUMBLE." by Kendrick Lamar and "24K Magic" by Bruno Mars. In song of the year, it's competing against "4:44" by JAY-Z, "Issues" by Julia Michaels, "1-800-273-8255" by Logic and "That's What I Like" by Bruno Mars. Outside the Bruno Mars songs, that's not a bad group of songs even though that's not the selection of songs I was expecting. Grammy's are kinda random like that. Sometimes I feel they pick their nominations out of a hat.  

20- "Wolves" - Selena Gomez & Marshmello (+31) -- This song was also performed at the AMAs in addition to having its video drop recently. So it's a double whammy with the chart points. I'm certainly happy. I would love this song to go top 10 because Selena and Marshmello are perfect for each other.

22- "Young Dumb & Broke" - Khalid (+7) -- If I'm right, there was a performance at the AMAs that was a medley of "Thunder" and "Young Dumb & Broke." That sounds like a strange medley and I'm not curious enough to figure out how that turned out. But it explains why this song hits a new high. Honestly not my favorite thing Khalid has done. I support him in general, but not with this song, really.

29- "Gummo" - 6ix9ine (+29) -- Ew gross. Get this song the heck away from here. Mr. violent temper-tantrum should be far away from the Billboard charts, not soaring up it. Please let this be a one-week thing.

34- "How Long" - Charlie Puth (+6) -- Oh dear. The radio continuing their confusing love affair with bland, boring Charlie Puth once again. Make it stop!

42- "Meant to Be" - Bebe Rexha & Florida Georgia Line (+9) -- This I support. Bebe's dip into country pop really works. Pop radio and country radio should be blasting this song, so I hope it continues to soar higher.

52- "Rubbin off the Paint" - YBN Nahmir (+28) -- Well, at least this song isn't YBN rapping about killing people 6ix9ine, but it's been two weeks and I had totally forgot that this boring piece of nonsense from a punk 17-year-old kid even existed. All these boring SoundCloud rap songs just combine into one big mess of awfulness for me.

63- "Lemon" - N.E.R.D & Rihanna (+16) -- I expected this song to start soaring up the charts, but it fell last week after its debut two weeks ago, so I guess I'll just have to wait and see if this actually catches on or just hangs around for a couple of months on the bottom half of the charts before going away. I'd be down with it becoming a hit because this is a fun song and we could use more fun songs right now.

66- "Candy Paint" - Post Malone (+12) -- This forgettable song from "Fate of the Furious" gaining traction thanks to Post Malone somehow celebrating seven weeks at No. 1 with his other song. Here's to hoping this doesn't become his next big hit, because I don't want him having anymore of those, like ever.

69- "Betrayed" - Lil Xan (+24) -- More SoundCloud nonsense rising. At least Lil Xan tried to make this an anti-drug song even though he got distracted on the verses. But no, I hope this disappears soon, too.

74- "Mayores" - Becky G featuring Bad Bunny (+10) -- Sure. I'll take Becky G and Bad Bunny. Bring this to the top 50!

87- "Too Much to Ask" - Niall Horan (+12) -- Is it too much for me to ask for me to hope Niall Horan goes away? This disappeared for a month or so before re-entering last week. I suppose I can't complain too much because 87 isn't very high at all.

New Arrivals:




47- Échame La Culpa" - Luis Fonsi & Demi Lovato -- It's Fonsi's follow-up to "Desapacito." Instead of doing a pure Latino song first and then remixing it with an English-speaking singer later, he gets straight to the point and features Demi on his song, with both singing in both English and Spanish during the song. This actually works really well. While Bieber's "Despacito" remix feels a bit forced and done just for the sake of popularity on the U.S. Billboard charts, Demi feels more natural, even if Fonsi's motivations for singing with her may be the same. You can't get a Latino song popular in the U.S. without including an American singer, right? But perhaps Demi feels more natural because she does have Mexican heritage through her father's line. I'm guessing this isn't the first time she's spoken or sang in Spanish. But if it is, then good on her. She sounds like a natural. If you are one who felt "Despacito" was annoying, I'm predicting you'll find this one less annoying. It's less in your face and less catchy, but it's also a really nice tune that I enjoy. I also think the lyrics are better than "Despacito." And I don't have to look up the English translation to figure it out because there's a lot of English in the song. But looking up that translation, it supports the idea that this is a song where the two lovers are putting the blame on themselves rather than putting the blame on the other. That's refreshing. I highly doubt this will become the next "Desapcito" for Fonsi, but I hope it has a decent run.

79- "Awful Things" - Lil Peep -- This is a song who's title describes most of 2017's music. I rolled my eyes when I saw this because someone by the name of Lil Peep releasing a song called "Awful Things" just sounded like another horrible SoundCloud rapper that I didn't want to deal with. But speaking of awful things, I looked up Lil Peep and learned that he died of a drug overdose a few weeks ago on November 15, which is probably why this song is here. When I read about him, he was labeled as an emo hip-hop artist whose songs were about very depressing subjects such as drug use and suicide. This song is definitely emo as he sounds angry that this relationship has been burned down to the ground as he wants the girl to say awful things to him so that it helps him get through things without her. But this song isn't rap or hip-hop. This is more like alternative rock. Which makes me curious to know how much like Linkin Park this whole album sounds like. I wonder how I would've felt about this guy had he not just passed away, but would this have charted if he were still alive? As is, it's kinda sad and somber listening to this in context. This is certainly much better than most of the awful things that have hit the charts this year.

86- "End Game" - Taylor Swift featuring Ed Sheeran & Future -- Taylor Swift still hasn't released her album on any streaming platforms, so I will forgo giving my opinion on this until I have a way of listening to it. I will say that Taylor Swift and Ed Sheeran sounds like a good collaboration. We've had that before on her album "Red" with the song "Everything Has Changed," which is a song I enjoy. Including Future, though, does not sound like a good idea. He usually ruins everything he touches. Because of that, I'm not expecting to like this song when I'm able to hear it.

90- "Home" - Machine Gun Kelly, X Ambassadors & Bebe Rexha -- Machine Gun Kelly. A white boy rapper that thinks he's a lot more cool than he is, but is no where close to the levels of the likes of Eminem and Macklemore. At the same time, though, I find him more tolerable than most of the rappers that come through the charts. On this song, MGK is talking about home in a way that's not anything special or unique when compared to the million other songs that are also titled "Home." But it's serviceable. We get a break from MGK on the verses, which is X Ambassadors and Bebe Rexha, who really feel more like afterthoughts on this song. Especially Bebe. I really like her as a singer, but she's used as more of a backup singer on this song, which is unfortunate. If MGK would've given her more to do, I would've been happier. Then we could've left X Ambassadors as the afterthought on the chorus. So overall this song comes off as very average. And when I noticed it's from the upcoming Netflix movie "The Bright," things made sense. It feels perfect as a serviceable filler track on a movie. If this is the big song this movie will be leaning on, that's a bit worrisome.

92- "When We" - Tank -- This song's titled followed by the artist name made me laugh. "When We Tank" should be a song about a losing sports team who's decided to tank for a good draft pick. But no, the artist calls himself Tank and his song is "When We." My question going in was, when we... what? Was this going to be a vague, meaningless song talking about nothing? That's not quite what we get here. The answer to this is, when we... make love with each other. And that's me editing it. So we have a slow, boring song from an R&B artist about making love with a girl that is neither sexy, nor interesting. In fact he's acting like an aggressive jerk in this song, sleeping with her not because he cares about her, but because he wants his own personal pleasure. Yeah, get this song away from me.

95- "Beautiful Trauma" - P!nk -- "Beautiful Trauma" is the second single from P!nk's new album, also called "Beautiful Trauma." It makes sense for her to release the title track from the album as her next single, even though I've been expecting her to release the Eminem collaboration "Revenge," especially since his new album is coming up. Seems like the perfect chance. But oh well. I'll take this song. I don't like it quite as much as "What About Us," but the idea of beautiful trauma is an interesting one. As P!nk said on twitter, life is very traumatic, but also quite beautiful with lots of great people. I also like the phrase in the song "my perfect rock bottom." With this being the opening track, it's a great way to open the album before we dive into all the other themes P!nk discusses.

96- "No Smoke" - YoungBoy Never Broke Again -- This is not a name I was excited to see on the charts again. But I guess we're making YoungBoy a thing. The hook in this song isn't bad, so I'll give him that. It made me wonder if this would be a tolerable rap song, but then we got to the verses and YoungBoy pushed on the gas really hard, but he didn't seem ready for it as he slurs, mumbles and falls all over himself as he crashes through those verses. As if he wrote the song without practicing it, then went straight to the studio where he recorded the song for the first time and turned it into a train wreck, but was too lazy to go back and smooth it out. That's all I got here.

98- "The Rest of Our Life" - Tim McGraw & Faith Hill -- Isn't it sweet and romantic? Tim McGraw and Faith Hill finally made an album together! And this is the song that starts the album off as Tim and Faith tell each other how much they love each other and how they will always feel young for the rest of their lives. It's kind of a sweet, mushy song that I don't really care for too much for. They have great chemistry as a couple and I'm sure those who have been fans of these two will really love this album, but I've never really cared too much for Tim McGraw. I sometimes have liked Faith Hill. But I don't know, this song just doesn't connect with me like romantic wedding songs should. I'm sure they had fun doing this and I'm sure people will like it, but it's just not for me.

99- "Written in the Sand" - Old Dominion -- Another country song that I don't really care for. That means we're 0 for 2 this week with our country songs this week. Whoever the singer is in Old Dominion, I don't care enough to look it up, he's trying to figure out what his relationship is with this girl. He can't decide if they were written in the stars and simply need to work things out or if they're written in the sand and are destined to be washed away. It feels kinda empty to me, lacking any depth or true meaning. At least Tim and Faith seemed to be having a good time with their song.

100- "Faking It" - Calvin Harris featuring Kehlani & Lil Yachty -- I recently listened to Calvin Harris' new album "Funk Wav Bounces Vol. 1" from earlier this year as the whole album showed up on the EDM charts during the summer. I usually enjoy Calvin Harris as more of a guilty pleasure EDM artist. Most of his songs are extremely simple and mostly the same, but he has a knack for coming up with a good enough beat that his songs grow on me as fun, harmless EDM songs that are worthy of playing at dance parties. This whole album was a mess, though. "Slide" and "Cash Out" were decent enough to start the album, but the rest of the album was completely uninteresting as he tried to cash in on the huge wave of hip-hop. Every single song has a different hip-hop artist featured and most songs also include a popular pop star tagging along as well. And it doesn't work for me. None of the songs are interesting. And none of them have the classic Calvin Harris beat that makes his song so fun at dance parties. With this song, Kehlani is droning on in boring fashion for most of the song, giving us cliche, boring pop lyrics while Lil Yachty comes in for a third verse feature. There's no drop. No dance beat. Little sign at all of Calvin Harris.

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