Billboard Hot 100 Top 10:
1- "Despacito" - Luis Fonsi & Daddy Yankee featuring Justin Bieber (=) -- Seven weeks at No. 1. It's closing in on the No. 1 spot on radio and still unstoppable in both streaming and sales. It seems to have peaked on the latter two, but it's not falling very fast at all, thus is why I think this is still going to be here for a while. At seven weeks at No. 1, it's now halfway to the 14 week total of "Macarena."
2- "I'm the One" - DJ Khaled featuring Justin Bieber, Quavo, Chance the Rapper & Lil Wayne (=) -- DJ Khaled and friends now look like they are going to be stuck at No. 2 for a while. I really don't get this song's appeal, so I am utterly confused as to why this is sticking around.
3- "That's What I Like" - Bruno Mars (=) -- Come on. What in the frack is this still doing here? Go away already!
4- "Wild Thoughts" - DJ Khaled featuring Rihanna & Bryson Tiller (new) -- OK, this is not what I meant when I've been crying for new songs in the top 10 the last few weeks. And now Rihanna has her 31st top 10 hit, behind only Madonna's 38 and The Beatles' 34. Joy. Just what we all wanted. This song is pretty darn awful and I'll get to why in the new arrivals section.
5- "Shape of You" - Ed Sheeran (-1) -- Ed Sheeran has now celebrated 24 weeks in the top five. And it has yet to drop below that range since it debuted at No. 1 earlier this year. And the only reason it fell a spot this week is because DJ Khaled's new song debuted. If that song has its expected second week drop, then this might rise again. Can we please be done with it?
6- "Humble." - Kendrick Lamar (-1) -- I would be really happy if this snuck ahead of Ed Sheeran next week as it has yet to wear out its welcome. One of the few good songs in this current top 10 that I think deserves to stick around for a while longer.
7- "Mask Off" - Future (-1) -- This better not rise again next week or else I'm going to throw a fit. But hey, at least "XO Tour Llif3" left the top 10 this week.
8- "Congratulations" - Post Malone featuring Quavo (+1) -- With DJ Khaled's debut, a one spot jump is essentially equivalent of a two spot jump. And I really have no idea why. What's the appeal to this monstrosity of a song?
9- "Something Just Like This" - The Chainsmokers & Coldplay (-2) -- The Chainsmokers have now celebrated 60 consecutive weeks in the top 10. Crazy! I still don't think Katy's 69-week record is in jeopardy, especially after a two spot drop for this song, but what an accomplishment. 60 consecutive weeks in the top 10.
10- "Stay" - Zedd & Alessia Cara (-2) -- This song better not "stay" in the top 10 next week. It was time for Zedd and Alessia to leave a while ago, so I really hope this is its final week.
Rising on the Hot 100:
11- "Believer" - Imagine Dragons (+4) -- I've not been super happy about Dan Reynolds and Imagine Dragons recently. I won't get to all of the reasons here, but the main one that pertains to this Billboard analysis is that they just released their third studio album and it's pretty darn mediocre. That's two straight mediocre albums after their phenomenal debut album. One mediocre album can be a simple bump in the road. I can forgive that. But two in a row is legitimately concerning. "Believer" itself is a catchy, upbeat song that sticks in my head, but I still don't think it's anything special and it makes me sad to see Imagine Dragons losing their touch.
16- "Unforgettable" - French Montana featuring Swae Lee (+2) -- I'm expecting this song to sneak into the top 10 eventually. Perhaps even in the next few weeks. And I'm fine with that. For the record, I'm not madly in love with this song, but compared to a lot of other rap songs that have been plaguing the music industry of late, this song is fairly tolerable.
34- "Strip that Down" Liam Payne featuring Quavo (+10) -- "Sign of the Times" continues to plummet while this song continues to gain steam. America has their priorities backwards when it comes to these former 1D singers. Unfortunately Liam is probably winning right now because he's featured the horrendously annoying and flat-out untalented Quavo.
46- "God, Your Mama, and Me" - Florida Georgia Line featuring Backstreet Boys (+5) -- I was wondering if this song was going to start rising. It's pretty unique and kinda fun to have the Backstreet Boys back on the charts. And it's even more unique to have them attached to a Florida Georgia Line song, but it's one that kinda works and I'd be fine with this song continuing to rise.
55- "4 AM" - 2 Chainz featuring Travis Scott (+29) -- 2 Chainz just dropped his album, didn't he? Oh joy. At least no new songs from him arrived this week, but I really hope these three that soared up are only here for this week. Let's not make these songs a thing.
58- "It's a Vibe" - 2 Chainz featuring Ty Dolla $ign, Trey Songz & Jhene Aiko (+37) -- Certainly don't make this song a thing. It's the worst of the bunch. And that's saying something because the other two are pretty awful.
70- "Good Drank" - 2 Chainz, Gucci Mane & Quavo (+24) -- I had forgotten this song existed until just now. And might I remind these dumb rappers that drank is PAST TENSE. It really bothers me when people purposely use awful grammar like this just to look cool.
87- "Reminder" - The Weeknd (+10) -- Apparently this song is being pushed as The Weeknd's next single. And I never covered it on this blog because it debuted last year along with the rest of his "Starboy" album, which rather shocked me, might I remind you. I hadn't liked much of anything from The Weeknd until this album rolled around, yet I found myself really loving it. Yet this specific song was one that I had totally forgotten about. That's because it felt like mediocre album filler. There's over 10 songs from the album that I would've rather seen made singles than "Reminder," so this is a disappointing turn of events. But oh well. It's not awful, so this could be worse.
New Arrivals:
4- "Wild Thoughts" - DJ Khaled featuring Rihanna & Bryson Tiller -- I'm going to judge this is a Rihanna song, because that's what this is. After DJ Khaled reminds us all that he has the best music, we start by Rihanna telling us that she knows we want to see her naked. I can't speak for everyone, but I actually don't. And I get mad every time she gets naked without warning in one of her music videos. With that type of introduction, I knew I was in for a doozy. And yes, this is about as unintelligent as you think as Rihanna is just trying to put some wild thoughts into our heads. Or better yet, she is saying she gets wild thoughts every time she's with whoever she's talking to. And, well, if the guy is anything like what Bryson Tiller is singing, she better get the heck out of there because he says he's going to bang her until she is burned out and cremated. Say, what? The only reason why this song kinda works musically is because Santana's "Maria Maria" is being sampled or interpolated and that's actually a good song. But it's certainly a waste of a sample given the lyrics that are dumped on it. Lastly, is Rihanna a Jets fan? Because she references the '68 Jets, who won Super Bowl III. If she's not, that's an awfully random team to call out in a song.
51- "Feels" - Calvin Harris featuring Pharrell Williams, Katy Perry & Big Sean -- Calvin Harris certainly has a lot of odd collaborations on this new album. Frank Ocean and Migos on "Slide." Young Thug, Pharrell and Ariana Grande on "Heatstroke." Future and Khalid on "Rollin." And looking at the song titles for the album that's soon to be released, each song is an odd collaboration. This time with "Feels," he brings back Pharrell while adding in Katy Perry and Big Sean. Just looking at that title, I knew that could be a home run if done right. But only one of those three comes to play on this track and it's certainly not Katy Perry as she phones in a chorus that just cries desperation especially because she's quoting Migos by singing "drop top." Big Sean also brings in a boring verse towards the end, so mathematically we're left with Pharrell as our standout. He starts us off and seems like he's actually having fun on what could've been an upbeat summer jam with the groove that Calvin Harris brings to the song. But yeah, the other two are just not there and thus Pharrell ends up caving under pressure as he can't carry this song on his own.
61- "First Day Out" - Kodak Black -- Well this is weird. Earlier this year a rapper by the name of Tee Grizzley wrote a rap song called "First Day Out" after he got released from jail and now Kodak Black has done the same thing because apparently he got arrested recently for violating his house arrest and was just released on June 5. I hope this doesn't become a trend. I don't need a new song called "First Day Out" from every rapper or singer who gets arrested. That would be a real dumb trend. So automatic negative points for unoriginality. And more negative points for mumbling through most of this song. And finally, a ton of negative points for Kodak Black rambling on about what he did after getting out and what his initial thoughts were because I don't care.
83- "Relationship" - Young Thug featuring Future -- Another thing I don't need in life is Young Thug and Future, two of my least favorite rappers, rambling on about all of their "relationships," aka all the girls they are sleeping around with. Yup. That's all this song is. A big pile of crap.
89- "Feel it Still" - Portugal. The Man -- An American rock band with eight studio albums, the last three of which have sold decently well? Why have I not heard of this group? It's probably because this is their first ever song to crossover onto the U.S. Hot 100, which makes me feel super lame that I heard of them only because they have a song. But this is one thing I love about the Billboard charts. I find songs, artists and bands like this that I otherwise would've never known. And in a day where most of the new songs are crap, we could definitely use a rocking song like this one. The lyrics are short and sweet, yet subtly brilliant. I watched a video of them on Genius of the band breaking this song down and this is very much a song about rebelling against the current sinking political regime. They conclude that this current political state might be like a few major movements in the past and it's time to stand up and take a stance instead of sitting back and watching. I love it. That and musically this song has a great groove to it that I predict will get better over time. I hope this catches fire and becomes a hit because we could use good stuff like this. I've now added their new album "Woodstock" onto my list of albums to listen to and grade. I'm excited to dive in!
100- "Real Hitta" - Plies featuring Kodak Black -- Oh, man, did you know these two are real hitters? Even certified smackers? Yah!!! Yaah!!!!! OK, I'm done making fun of the song now. So it's time to start complaining. Kodak Black is stretching his parts out like taffy or like he's trying to run through the mud. And he's mumbling the whole time. Plies finally comes in and relieves me from this piece of trash rapper called Kodak Black and it's a relief that he's actually rapping at a normal pace AND is coherent. I can understand him! So kudos there. But oh my goodness does he have some hilariously awful, cringe worthy lines. I both facepalmed and started laughing at the same time. Did the dude proofread his lyrics before he started spouting them out?