Billboard Hot 100 Top 10:
1- "Nice for What" - Drake (=) -- I was honestly curious to see how this week would turn out because I wasn't 100 percent confident that "Nice for What" would be able to hold onto the top spot. The sales were set to tank and the radio hasn't quite caught up yet. If the streaming tumbled, then it was possible that "God's Plan" would recover and go back to No. 1. That's actually a common thing among songs that debuted at No. 1. Exactly half of the songs that debuted at the top, 15 of 30, have fallen down in the second week. But "Nice for What" becomes part of the half that remained at the top in week two and that's because the aforementioned streaming essentially remained even with 59.3 million U.S. streams compared to the 60.4 million from last week. That's a great sign for the song moving forward. Even though the radio hasn't caught up yet, it's starting to gain a lot of momentum, meaning at the very least this should be in the top 10 for a long time, perhaps 20+ weeks.
2- "God's Plan" - Drake (=) -- With "God's Plan" unable to regain the lead against fellow Drake song "Nice for What," we now begin the countdown of what this song could've done had Drake been smart and not dethroned himself as it now appears that this song's lead is officially over, especially since it's beginning to bleed in every category except for radio and even that seems to have plateaued. This week would've been week 13 at the top. And I'm fairly certain it would've been able to hold on next week to get to week 14. Ariana Grande is heading for a splashy debut next week with "No Tears Left to Cry," but even though she has the sales, I'm not so sure she has enough streaming to debut ahead of "God's Plan." J. Cole also will be album bombing next week and may sneak into the top 10 with "KOD" or "Kevin's Heart." But despite that movement, I think Drake keeps the top two spots again next week.
3- "Meant to Be" - Bebe Rexha & Florida Georgia Line (=) -- Drake's continued dominance means Bebe and FGL again have to remain content with the third spot. With 142 million in total radio audience, the song remains on top of the radio charts for a third straight week. Normally a radio total that high makes a song contender for the top spot, but Drake still has too much streaming, which is something "Meant to Be" doesn't really have much of anymore.
4-"Psycho" - Post Malone featuring Ty Dolla $ign (=) -- I look forward to the day when we can forget this whole Post Malone thing ever happened. As is, this worthless piece of nothing is still leaving an ugly taint on the Billboard charts. The charts will remain awful overall until this song goes away.
5- "The Middle" - Zedd, Maren Morris & Grey (+1) -- Fun fact of the week. "The Middle" by this trio of artists as matched the peak of "The Middle" by Jimmy Eat World back in 2002. The latter composition will remain the song that stands the test of time as it's quite possible most people will forget about Zedd and Maren's version when all is said and done, but I still think this is a song that's enjoyable enough, thus I'm happy for both artists. I'm neutral when it comes to Grey as they've not yet done anything that's told me they're worth paying attention to, but Zedd and Maren I will root for.
6- "Look Alive" - BlocBoy JB featuring Drake (-1) -- Thank heavens this finally dropped out of the top five. Again. Now let's keep it out of the top five this time around and not let it get back to the region. In fact, let's drop it out of the top 10 altogether. Again.
7- "Perfect" - Ed Sheeran (=) -- There's been a lot of top 10 movement on the charts recently, which makes it impressive that "Perfect" has remained here still where the likes of Bruno's "Finesse" has officially been booted. I don't expect this to last much longer, but I definitely won't be upset if it remains ahead of the next three songs.
8- "Freaky Friday" - Lil Dicky featuring Chris Brown (+1) -- I'm ready to completely forget that this song ever existed. I said at the beginning that I would be willing to be content with one week in the top 10 as some stupid, viral song. But now it's spent five weeks in the top 10, which is at least four weeks too many. Listen, I'm not violently opposed to this song. It's just extremely unintelligent and painfully forgettable. I don't think there's one person on earth that will remember this was even a thing a few years from now. Chris Brown fans will probably even forget that he did this.
9- "I Like It" - Cardi B, Bad Bunny & J Balvin (-1) -- As was expected, Cardi B's songs most all tanked this week following her album bomb last week. Yet this song remained in the top 10, meaning it just might hold onto some traction and stay here. I wouldn't completely hate that. Yes, it's a disgusting reworking of a much better song, but there were at least seven songs on the album that I disliked even more, so I suppose I could accept this for now. Or, rather, it could be worse.
10- "Chun-Li" - Nicki Minaj (+82) -- The surprising thing isn't the fact that both Nicki's songs jumped up super high this week. They snuck onto the charts last week after only a day or so, meaning this week is their first full week of tracking. The surprising this is that it's "Chun-Li" that broke the top 10 and not "Barbie Tingz" given that it was "Barbie Tingz" that debuted higher last week at No. 83, but only managed to soar up to No. 25 this week. I didn't say much about these two songs last week and I'll continue to mostly ignore them since all this is from Nicki is her feeling jealous that Cardi B is becoming the more popular female rapper, so Nicki anticipated Cardi's album drop and released two songs all about how Nicki is still the best female rapper in the business. And it's laughable because not only is she helping Cardi's case by releasing two atrocious songs that say the same thing, but the first full week of tracking for "Chun-Li" wasn't even able to get higher than Cardi's "I Like It," a week AFTER Cardi's album drop. Both "Chun-Li" and "Barbie Tingz" are poised for a 70 percent or higher drop next week on sales and are both fading from streaming, too. So thankfully they'll be gone next week.
Rising on the Hot 100:
13- "Never Be the Same" - Camila Cabello (+2) -- It's been a bit of a confusing run for this song in the teens as it's yo-yoed the last month or so when I thought it was going to go straight for the top 10. But perhaps jumping up to No. 13 this week will help it finally sneak into the top 10. I've kinda given up on the idea of this being as huge as "Havana," but I'm still holding out for a few weeks in the top 10, so I hope it gets there.
17- "Call Out My Name" - The Weeknd (+3) -- That EP from The Weeknd may have been disappointing as a whole, which is why I'm not shedding a tear seeing all the songs tank pretty hard, but I'm happy to see this opening track getting real traction. I would love to see this make a return to the top 10 and stay there, because on its own it's still a pretty enjoyable song, on par with most of the songs he's put out in his career.
20- "Whatever It Takes" - Imagine Dragons (+2) -- I suppose I can be happy that the momentum for "Whatever It Takes" seems to have slowed down quite a bit after I thought it was on its way to be the third straight dull Imagine Dragons song to camp out in the top 10. So there's that. I'm still not happy to see this in the top 20. Imagine Dragons' music deserves to burn and die in a deep, dark empty pit until the now pathetic band can come back with music that's actually worth something.
21- "Friends" - Marshmello & Anne-Marie (+13) -- After Cardi's album bomb last week, this week wasn't quite as eventful as I thought it would be, but I'm glad to see that "Friends" is one of the songs that bounced back and is now close to being top 20.
25- "Barbie Tingz" - Nicki Minaj (+58) -- Refer to my comment on "Chun-Li" for my commentary on this song. This jumped up to No. 25 this week, but will thankfully be dropping right back down next week.
29- "You Make It Easy" - Jason Aldean (+12) -- The biggest beneficiary from Cardi's songs dropping off this week is the country genre as a whole as several country songs recovered big. They're led by Jason Aldean, which is not surprising, but is also unfortunate because this song I don't care for.
43- "Most People Are Good" - Luke Bryan (+17) -- The second country song to recover big comes from Luke Bryan. This song has good intentions, making it a step above Jason Aldean in terms of quality, but for the most part it misses the mark for me as well.
57- "Tequila" - Dan + Shay (+20) -- I know some that will be happy to see Dan + Shay close to breaking top 50. While I'm not upset at their success, they're yet another country act that I don't care for. This song is just another boring drinking/break-up song as whoever is the lead singer is sad because the tequila he's drinking reminds him of his girl while no other drink does. Yawn.
62- "Boo'd Up" - Ella Mai (+10) -- Not a country song, meaning other genres did will, too. This comes from our trio of new female R&B singers from two weeks ago. Of the three songs, this is probably the one I cared for less, but I still think it's an enjoyable song, despite being a touch to cheesy, so I'm fine with it getting a boost this week, although not a huge one, so there's no guarantee this becomes a huge hit.
63- "Everyday" - Logic & Marshmello (+13) -- Logic still exists, in case you're like me and already forgot about everything he did with "Bobby Tarantino II." While nothing from that album has survived, it's his collaboration with Marshmello that still has some life in it, which is not a huge improvement over the album itself. I'd be fine with us continuing to promote other Marshmello songs like "Friends," while letting this song drop off.
66- "I Lived It" - Blake Shelton (+28) -- Back to country, now. And like the Luke Bryan song, this song ALMOST does it for me. Good intentions. But ultimately it also misses the mark. But because Blake could sing about anything and his fans will eat it up regardless, it's no surprise to see this rising high.
82- "For the First Time" - Darius Rucker (+16) -- Ah ha! Finally a country song that rose this week that actually DESERVES to rise. Granted, this isn't the best thing Darius Rucker has put out, but he's a country singer that I find myself mostly enjoying, so I'd be happy to see this song gain momentum on the country charts.
New Arrivals:
24- "Esskeetit" - Lil Pump -- I've heard some on the internet saying, "God, please give us Avicii back. We'll trade you for Lil Pump." That causes me to almost shout out "AMEN!" Except I don't really wish death on anyone. I just wish Lil Pump would go away. A year after becoming a huge phenomenon after repeating the words "gucci gang" over and over in a song, he's back with another song where he's slurring and mumbling the whole way through about cars, money and drugs. "Esskeetit" is a slurred version of "Let's Get It" in case you were wondering. To all you 10-year-olds, both in literal age and mental state, listening to the rap music against your parents' wishes because you're feeling cool and hip, can you at least go be rebellious and listen to rap music from rappers who can actually rap? Yeah, that's probably too much to ask. But seriously, I don't see how any grown adult with at least one ounce of sense can listen to this and consider it good, quality rap music.
48- "Cry Pretty" - Carrie Underwood -- Here's an actual single from Carrie Underwood, the first one from her upcoming sixth studio album also called "Cry Pretty," which is scheduled for release on September 14. I make that distinction because her previous song "The Champion" was just a Super Bowl song and was thus not promoted to any country or pop radio, which is a shame, I think. But oh well. "Cry Pretty" is a very human, honest song from Carrie, which is not out of the normal for Carrie as she's really good with her lyrics and music. I'm normally not a huge country fan, but I've been a fan of Carrie's from the beginning during her "American Idol" days. In "Cry Pretty," Carrie sings a personal song to all the girls out there saying sometimes you've just gotta let your emotions out instead of covering them up and claiming everything is alright when it's really not. I think that's a good message to declare, even though I'll admit that it's not groundbreaking in any way. And the lyrics in the chorus stumble over themselves a bit as I had to think about it for a second to figure out what exact she's saying. Also, in the very large and impressive Carrie discography, I don't imagine this will ever be one that stands out. In fact, I like "The Champion" quite a bit more, but maybe that's because I'm a dude who loves sports rather than a girl who goes through the specifics of what Carrie describes in this song. All that said, this is good enough for me.
73- "Let Me" - ZAYN -- I almost quit this song after the first line, which goes like this, "Sweet baby, our sex has meaning." Shut the front door and get out of my life, ZAYN. No one likes you and no one wants you. But OK. I progressed further through the song and it was about what I expected. ZAYN is trying to be romantic and sexy, but it all feels empty and artificial. It sounds like he's writing from the perspective of being in the middle of a one-night stand, hoping that this is the girl who will make it through the night and still be by his side, which of course means she's going to be the one he's going to spend the rest of his life with. Yet instead of being romantic and stating why he loves her, all he can really focus on is her body. So again, this feels like the thoughts going through his head during the first night ever with this girl rather than being a song about a long-time girlfriend who he's loved for months or years. That and the song feels boring and lifeless. Instead of giving me the feels about a desired romance, it makes me want to go to sleep and forget this ever happened.
84- "Guatemala" - Swae Lee, Slim Jxmmi & Rae Sremmurd -- The redundancy of this credit kills me. Swae Lee and Slim Jxmmi ARE Rae Sremmurd. Even if I list it how Billboard lists it as opposed to the way that it's listed on iTunes, we'd still have Swae Lee featuring Slim Jxmmi, which is almost as silly. Why not just say "Guatemala" by Rae Sremmurd if both are a part of the song? Sure, this is from an upcoming Swae Lee solo album, but is it really a solo album when he still his other half of Rae Sremmurd singing with him? Anyways, all sorts of headaches there. Onto the song, though, I actually like Swae Lee more than I often care to admit. Songs like "Unforgettable" and "Powerglide" have catchy beats and a lot of groove, meaning the guy has potential. This song feels very stiff, though. Most of Swae Lee's lines are the same length and have the same exact note pattern. Like he wrote one bar of music, then copied and pasted for the rest of the song. Slim Jxmmi comes in on the third verse and in his normal mediocre way, barfs up something awful that's not even in rhythm with Swae Lee. If Swae wants to do a solo album, why doesn't he just abandon Jxmmi? That would be for the best. It would also be nice if someone is around to light a fire under Swae because he has the talent, I just think sometimes he doesn't care to do anything with his talent.
89- "Anybody" - Young Thug featuring Nicki Minaj -- More of Nicki trying to desperately convince people that she's the best female rapper in the business. So in reality, we got three of those songs. But before you get to that, you have to wade your way through Young Thug's incoherent mumbles that lost me a few times when I was even following along with the lyrics. I don't even know what he's talking about here. He starts off by claiming that he didn't kill anyone, but had something to do with that body. But even if you wanted to hear more about whatever that was about, which I didn't, he loses focus and just rambles on about random things. When Nicki picks up, it's apparent that she tried to pick up where he left off and thus keep focus on whatever this song is about, but she even sounds confused as she drops some bars that make no sense before giving up and just rapping about how much better she is than the rest. Yet strangely I enjoyed her verse quite a bit more. Not because it was good. But because I could understand the words she was saying, which is more of a testament to how awful the Young Thug portion of this song is.
99- "Gotti" - 6ix9ine -- I thought I was done with 6ix9ine for a while. I've been happily watching all of his songs that charted this year tumble down the charts after their initial momentum, as if even the people who listen to all this trash rap music suddenly started realizing that this guy is a creep that belongs in prison, not on the charts. But somehow, another from the album snuck onto the charts this week. I gave up a long time ago on 6ix9ine ever releasing anything worthwhile, thus my one condition for me passing his songs off as forgettable nonsense rather than offensive garbage is that he not brag about killing people in his rap. And he mostly fails at that. Surprisingly, in "Gotti," he's not talking about murder. In fact, he's not even screaming at me like he normally is, which rather shocked me. I braced for the screaming and got normal singing. Maybe his throat was just sore after recording the other songs, so he did this one in a normal voice. So yeah, I'll dump this one into forgettable nonsense, which is practically a high praise for me. But don't get me wrong, this is still nonsense. He's not screaming and he's not killing anyone, but it's still all about drugs, money and sex. One line that made me laugh in the middle of the song is when he says he hopes God gives him a chance. I'm not one to judge, but if he actually meant that, he should study the commandment of "Thou shalt not kill." It's kind of a big one among God-fearing people. Also, he still loves dropping the n-word, despite NOT being black. White folk aren't allowed to use that word, but I guess he didn't get the memo.
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